by Ryan Arthur
Damn that sorcerer! 20 gold pieces and I'm wankered on Rohypnol!
Do not adjust your monitors: the Sunday News Recap, a week late, is on the internet and ready to go, featuring the last seven…fourteen…days’ worth of reviews and features from the crew here at eFC/HBS. We’ll also run down the box office numbers for the weekend and prepare you for the week ahead. I’m Ryan, and Ah, well. Prepare to put mustard on those words, for you will soon be consuming them along with this slice of humble pie that comes direct from the oven of shame, set at gas mark egg on your face…I sort of forget what I was talking about.
”Team! Team, team, team, team, team. I even love saying the word 'team'. You probably think this is a picture of my family? No! It's a picture of The A-Team. Bodie, Doyle, Tiger, the Jewellery Man.”
Reviews from our staff over the last week:
Les Miserables (2012)
Promised Land (2012)
Les Miserables (2012)
Texas Chainsaw 3D
Eric Lefenfeld (New Reviewer)
Promised Land (2012)
The Central Park Five
Want more reviews from a particular author? Click on the author's name. Want more reviews, regardless of author? Check out the database. Don't know what you want? Try searching the database.
”Ah! The IT-department. Run by a dynamic go-getter, a genius and a man from Ireland.”
We've got new features from our staff as well:
The Sunday News Recap! 12.23.12
Criticwatch – The 2012 Peter Travers Retrospective
Criticwatch – The 2012 Pete Hammond Retrospective
Criticwatch 2012 – The Whores Of The Year
Films I Neglected To Review: Rope-A-Dopes
DVD Reviews For 12/30: “Talent Is More Erotic When It’s Wasted.”
The 10 Best Films Of 2012: Catchy Title, Eh?
The Worst Films Of 2012
Films That Deserved Better: The Critical And Box-Office Misfits Of 2012
The Best Films Of 2012
The Best And Worst Of 2012: Clouds And Cabins And Speedy Hobbits, Oh My!
You can access more features from a particular writer by clicking on his or her name. Want more features, coverage, interviews and the like? Click on the More option, found directly below the article title. Want more features, period? Check out the database. Don't know what you want? Try searching the database.
” Well, that's easy to remember! 0118 999 881 999 119 725…3.”
Here is the preliminary top ten for the weekend. Estimates are taken from Box Office Mojo.com and are rounded up, where applicable.
1. Texas Chainsaw 3D $23.0 million
2. Django Unchained $20.0 million ($106.4 million total)
3. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey $17.5 million ($263.8 million total)
4. Les Miserables (2012) $16.1 million ($103.6 million total)
5. Parental Guidance $10.1 million ($52.8 million total)
6. Jack Reacher $9.3 million ($64.8 million total)
7. This Is 40 $8.6 million ($54.5 million total)
8. Lincoln $5.3 million ($143.9 million total)
9. The Guilt Trip $4.5 million ($31.2 million total)
10. Promised Land (2012) $4.3 million ($4.7 million total)
”If two grown men can't make a pervert happy for a few minutes in order to watch a film about zombies, then maybe we should all just move to Iran!”
Opening This Week:
Horrid Henry: The Movie
Struck By Lightning
”You wouldn't shoot a Policeman and then steal his helmet. You wouldn't go to the toilet in his helmet, and then send it to the Policeman's grieving widow, and then steal it again. Downloading films is stealing; if you do it you WILL face the consequences!”
Previewing the week ahead...
We've got more DVD and Blu-Ray recommendations in our Upcoming DVD Release Schedule.
Look for regular updates and additions in Criticwatch from Erik Childress on Friday, as well.
And hey, don't forget to visit the Contest page for your chance to win DVDs and other assorted movie-related swag from eFC/HBS.
We'll also have some additional features and editorials throughout the week, and I'll have your Recap ready to go on Sunday.
“ Oh my word. When did the English start drinking like that? You people drink like you don't want to live.”
And just like that, the Sunday News Recap is done for both the week and the previous year. HELLS TEETH! They're just cars! I'm not aroused! God DAMN these electric sex pants! Don’t forget, we’ll (probably) be back next Sunday with another edition of the Recap. You can always take a look at our previous Recaps and join and visit our forums, too. I hope your 2012 ended on a high note and that your 2013 began on just as high a peak, with even greater heights ahead. Thanks for reading, and as always, your feedback is appreciated.
link directly to this feature at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/feature.php?feature=3494
originally posted: 01/06/13 17:03:14
last updated: 01/06/13 17:05:22