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Will Farrel has a Contract with Satan!

 
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Mr.Dark



Joined: 29 Jul 2010
Posts: 40

PostPosted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:07 am    Post subject: Will Farrel has a Contract with Satan! Reply with quote

Monday, August 30th

Got to NotL and missed all the most convenient show times and thought the Will Farrell movie posted looked good. The Other Guys sucks a bag of dongs and I deserved no better. My last Will Farrell movie was the Land of the Lost - sucked dong, Marky Mark's latest was the Happening - sucked a bag of dongs, the writer/director last did Anchorman - sucked a crateful.
It starts okay and then SAMUEL L M-F- JACKSON and the Rock jump off a building so does the movie. Will Farrell is an accounting geek, Marky Mark a would-be supercop and they go after Bernie Madoff - basically. The entire movie is composed of four different things - all of which aren't even a little funny individually or collectively.

1) Non-jokes - Michael Keaton was in Night Shift, he was Beetlejuice - and now he's a police captain with a second job at Bed Bath and Beyond so his son can go to college and explore his bisexuality - and I think this is the joke. It's like being told San Diego means "whale's vagina". Twice.
2) Repeated non-jokes - grandma's using her walker to cross the street to delivery increasingly graphic messages between Will and wife, Eva Mendez is so pretty, everything the Captain says is the song title of something by TLC - who, since they've been gone for 5 years - has probably been forgotten by most of the audience anyway.
3) Strangeness - weird musical numbers (also in Anchorman), Will's character shouting "America" before slamming on the gas and driving into a crime scene and destroying it, the "office pop", Will's life as Gator the Pimp, etc. This is as close to comedy as a the movie gets, it's random pointless shit - it's ADD as a filmmaking technique.
4) Idiot Manchild - and this was so bad my mind retreated into itself out of defense and I realized something about myself. I hate idiot man child movies - a none too bright, none too stable certified jerk acts like a self absorbed screaming insensitive jackass but in the end gets the girl, the money, and gets to be the hero - basically most of Will Farrell's and Adam Sandler's career. The only way these losers work onscreen is they have to face off a villain even more ridiculously cartoony than they are and they usually write the script. In real life, say when you are 12 and your mom marries one of them, and there isn't a bad guy or their fingers on the keyboard they are remarkably not cute and amazingly not funny.

One funny line out of Michael Keaton wasn't worth $10 - fuck Will Farrell and Marky Mark - I swear he must have a contract with Satan that allows him to keep making movies.
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Miss Horror



Joined: 18 Apr 2010
Posts: 94
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin

PostPosted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 10:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The only movies Will did that I liked (as far as I can remember) is Old School, Elf, and Zoolander. I also like the skit he did called "The Landlord". Other than that his movies are just not funny to me at all. Some actors do their best work sticking with Saturday Night Live.

Mark Wahlberg's best acting was in Fear with Reese Witherspoon. He was so dry in Happening, Four Brothers, and Lovely Bones. I know he can do it...maybe the directors want him that way. Don't know.

It was quite a surprise to see Samuel L. Jackson in tighty whiteys in Goodfellas. It really changes your perspective of such a bad ass.
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Jack Sommersby
HBS Monkey
HBS Monkey


Joined: 12 Dec 2002
Posts: 4440
Location: Helena, Montana

PostPosted: Fri Sep 17, 2010 12:09 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I 100% agree with you that Fear was Wahlberg's best and only notable performance. And, yes, he's fatally bland in non-colorful roles; as a straight leading man, he just doesn't have the screen presence and vitality to sustain much in the way of audience interest. And what a blank wall he was in The Happening -- with all the horrific goings-on, he looks no more put-out then if his shoes were untied.

Also, Leonard DiCaprio isn't exactly bursting with charisma, either, and is pretty mediocre -- like Julia Roberts, he's a movie star first and a thespian second.
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Alex Paquin
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Joined: 16 Jul 2002
Posts: 1727
Location: Quebecland

PostPosted: Sun Sep 19, 2010 11:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Quote:
Also, Leonard DiCaprio isn't exactly bursting with charisma, either, and is pretty mediocre -- like Julia Roberts, he's a movie star first and a thespian second.


Julia Roberts -- agreed. Maybe it's just her type I can't stand, especially when all she seems to play, outside of romantic comedies, is the "idealistic ditz/down-to-earth single mother on whom reality comes crashing down, after which she develops brains" formula. I've managed to avoid most of her films, but "Erin Brockovich" is a typical example. See also: "The Pelican Brief"; I saw that one recently, and all I remember about it is the ineptitude of the secret service when it comes to car bombs, and the steadfast belief that the mighty press will make things right in the end (but how do you know they'll print it?).

But Leonardo DiCaprio is far more talented than "mediocre". Okay, getting your start as a teenager heartthrob isn't usually conducive to a career as a great respectable actor later on, but his career post-2000 is solid. "Gangs of New York" was a mistake, but he was quite effective in "Catch Me if You Can", and memorable in "The Aviator". (Haven't seen him in anything after the latter, but looking at the filmography, there's no way someone "mediocre" could have been involved in that many serious film projects. What has Roberts done in the meantime?)

I know, there's the old double standard between actors and actresses, and there are few choice parts for women past 40, except maybe a secondary role in someone else's movie. The few who succeeded in having memorable long-term careers (into their fifties or sixties) usually had personal magnetism or acting talent, not just good looks -- and in some cases, perhaps had long careers because they were not particularly attractive physically (Katharine Hepburn, Lauren Bacall, etc.). Julia Roberts? No. Not when the largest photo on your Wikipedia page was taken in 2002.
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