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Overall Rating

Awesome: 9.41%
Worth A Look: 23.76%
Just Average34.16%
Pretty Crappy: 22.77%
Sucks: 9.9%

11 reviews, 136 user ratings

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I, Robot
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by Kevin Thomas

"I, Average"
3 stars

What is this desire that Hollywood has to dumb down anything that might leave people, I don’t know, thinking? What are they so scared of? I mean, no matter what this movie would have you believe, a world where humanoid robots are an integrated part of our society is not thirty years away, so letting the audience mull over the concept is hardly going to upset any upcoming business revolutions.

Though I won’t take you on a step by step guide of the plot, I will let you know that in the opening ten minutes you will have seen enough of Smith’s toned bod to last you a lifetime, and enough product placements to make the average teen movie blush. I’d heard it was bad, but I was taken aback. When he wakes up, he spends a VERY LONG TIME staring at his shiny JVC stereo, before getting a nice FED-EX package (nice lingering shot of the box) containing his brand new Converse trainers (vintage 2004; that’s right folks, they’re IN SHOPS NOW); a pair of trainers which then go on to have a bigger role than half the supporting cast and then gets into his futuristic Audi to drive to work. I know a movie like this would need a big budget, but there’s a line. I mean, surely the pitch (get this - ‘Will Smith fights a big fucking army of robots’) alone would secure a plentiful budget?

But once you’re completely reassured that all your favourite brands will still be around in the hundreds of years in the future that this looks like it is set in, something hits you. This is only meant to be thirty years in the future! THIRTY! Compare our world to the world of thirty years ago; bad fashion sense, crummy music and a handful of excellent sci-fi movies. What hasn’t happened though, is a complete and utter revolution of almost every aspect of society. Even the Internet, which has had by far the greatest impact on our society, has not had such a ridiculously visible effect It’s not too hard to maybe, at a stretch, think that humanoid robots are a possibility. But it’s a big stretch to imagine that and to imagine that they would anything less than Top-Secret military projects causing havoc in an underground research facility is even harder. Imagining that they are commonplace commodities walking the streets, cleaning up rubbish and being sold to the general public is almost impossible. It wouldn’t be too bad if it stopped there either, but that’s only the beginning. Cars drive themselves anywhere you want them to, strange arms come out of walls to grab said cars and place them in vertical car park spaces, the sci-fi staple of the scan-able police badges makes an appearance and absolutely EVERYTHING seems to be mechanised and computerised. Even harder to swallow than this is how fast all humans seem to have lost touch with the ‘old’ way of doing things. Humans stand agog in front of old fashioned stereos, unable to perform simple tasks like pressing ‘Play’ if they can’t operate it by voice. Thirty years might seem like a long time to the fifteen-year-old target audience (in fact, most probably picture themselves being dead or, worse, GROWN UP by then), but the idea that entire fabric of society could be so massively revolutionised, with all the older ways completely forgotten, in thirty years is a bit of a push.

But, eventually, these ludicrous constructs stop being so grating. The story is actually interesting enough for such factors to fade away into the back of you mind. Set piece after set piece plays out brilliantly. A long chase through an empty tunnel (a tunnel that was packed out with traffic a mere twenty minutes earlier, but this is the least of the ridiculous plot holes) whilst swarms of robots attack Spooner (Smith) in his not-so-shiny Audi is excellently paced. It is certainly one of the more successful action pieces of recent times, and it is only one of at least three pretty damn good pieces.
Smith outshines the rest of the cast with ease, which is actually a shame. Smith is at his best when he has a similarly skilled comedic actor to play off. He has his fair share of one-liners, but banter is his true skill. The fact that his most capable co-star is a cat is a sign of some serious problems on the casting couch. You can almost see the desperation in his Smith’s eyes as he desperately searches his co-stars’ eyes for some flicker of presence. Instead, all he gets is a disinterested array of faces so cardboard that Keanu Reeves actually looks emotional. Then again, I, Robot is not meant to be a funny story, so maybe it’s not that bad a thing that Smith doesn’t get to spend the whole time goofing off with his co-stars.

Which brings us to the story that it is based upon. I won’t try and pretend that I have and start ripping off other people’s criticisms; I have not read the story. However, I know from past experience that saying that a movie was ‘based’ upon a certain book/novel means that the directors can do pretty much whatever the hell they want with the story. When the credits roll, the brilliant line ‘Suggested by the novel ‘I, Robot’ by Isaac Asimov’ appears on screen. If Steven King’s ‘The Running Man’ can be royally butchered into the Arnie movie and still be allowed to be credited with being ‘Based upon the novel’, God knows what kind of massacring ‘Suggested by’ entails. From what I’ve heard from various sources, the only things that made of from page to screen are Asimov’s famous three laws of robotics and the title. However, the storyline is pleasantly engaging. The tale of whether or not it was possible for robots to override the three laws and kill a human moves along at a swift pace and throws in just enough twists and turns to keep your head up. True, some of the twists seem unnecessary and aren’t really explored enough to make them worthy additions to the plot, but there’s more than enough to keep you interested, even if not totally satisfied.

Those expecting a wonderful realisation of a brilliant man’s dreams in fancy CGI (and it is very fancy CGI; the whole thing looks utterly wonderful) will be disappointed. Those expecting two hours of fighting robots, big explosions and a few cracking one-liners will get a lot more than they bargained for. Just go for a good time and you’ll have one, as sometimes expectations are a bad thing.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=10202&reviewer=368
originally posted: 08/08/04 16:27:19
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User Comments

3/24/18 morris campbell not bad some good effects 4 stars
10/06/16 BillyBobJones itwas k fam 5 stars
12/03/14 Ayana Pendergrass I Robot captivates me each time I watch! Great movie 5 stars
1/18/12 Marc DC Not a big W. Smith fan, but this was surprisingly one of his best. 4 stars
11/17/10 warmpotato Bleh. The script makes little sense, and Will Smith was horribly miscast. 2 stars
11/11/10 AlleyPhern If Will Smith was not in it, I would have given it 3 stars instead 2 stars
7/11/09 the dork knight Cromwell deserves a bigger role than that of a creepy hologram, but ok. 4 stars
8/11/08 Shaun Wallner Started off Great but then it started to drag on. 2 stars
12/19/07 Pamela White could be better 3 stars
11/17/07 Tee Not great, but Will smith is always watchable. Effects are good. 3 stars
10/14/07 fools♫gold If it's Alex Proyas, it must be somewhat good... 4 stars
8/21/07 movie crazed ok movie, worth a look though the plot seemed to be kinda confusing 4 stars
7/11/07 MaDmAN I actually liked this movie, you'll watch it, then forget it, but it's entertaining 4 stars
4/01/07 R.W.Welch Overblown in places but not bad overall. Smith shows the right touch. 3 stars
3/19/07 Stanley Thai Overly a good popcorn entertainment 4 stars
3/07/07 man good movie 4 stars
3/04/07 Bitchflaps Will Smith is irritating, Moynahan is deadwood, can't think of anything I liked about it. 1 stars
11/10/06 Henry fucking bullshit 1 stars
9/11/06 Charles Tatum Nicely updated, Smith is lots of fun 4 stars
8/26/06 Claaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiirrrrrrreeeeeeee!!!!!! This movie is sooo boring and horrible! had to watch it for robotics! 1 stars
8/09/06 Dragon The Artist Another medieocre popcorn flick; just good enough to follow n' watch. 3 stars
7/02/06 MikeT Would have like it to be more meaningful, but is great as an action flick. 4 stars
6/19/06 Carol Baker pretty good for animated cartoon. Had good 3 D look. 4 stars
5/30/06 Wanker Should have won all the Golden Globe awards for bad movie. 1 stars
5/26/06 YYY Acting and dialogue are so bad 2 stars
4/03/06 okierazorbacker Remarkably dumb but looks great in a sanitized, videogame kind of way 3 stars
4/01/06 JRE just good 4 stars
2/06/06 Anthony A Great Sci-Fi movie 4 stars
1/03/06 Steve Newman An enjoyable couple of hours watching this film - its ok 4 stars
10/10/05 Quigley I love this movie. awesome sci-fi story and CG, robots were stunning, smith was funny. see 5 stars
10/03/05 Sully blah 3 stars
9/26/05 millersxing Chi-town 2035 is 2 stars
9/21/05 Jonathon Holmes fun from start to finish 4 stars
9/13/05 bbbr shit, kiss my ass 1 stars
8/31/05 ES Not as bad as was thought, cool FX, but the trailers gave too much away 3 stars
8/07/05 glabber Not bad, not great, just average in every department, except FX 3 stars
8/07/05 fnia fleissig I love will smith, but this film was turgid and pointless 2 stars
7/26/05 Malaka Waste of time, waste of effort, waste of Fucking money, what was smith thinking? 1 stars
7/25/05 Eric Rollins Robots too creepy looking to be sympathetic. Sort of like Will Smith. 3 stars
7/10/05 slanes Enjoyed the movie, held my interest, good special effects, and Will Smith is great. 4 stars
7/02/05 Charlie Great Special Effects, And An Interesting Idea. 4 stars
6/20/05 tony Great adventure movie both for kids and adults. You all will love it! 4 stars
6/14/05 Quigley one of the best sci-fi flicks ever birthed. the robots are so awesome. gotta see it! 5 stars
6/07/05 Darcy average interpretation of a complex story 4 stars
6/04/05 Denise Gannon even Will Smith is getting tired of acting like Will Smith... where's Blade Runner 2? 1 stars
5/18/05 CB Cool!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
5/01/05 Valerie Excellent Movie, Excellent Special Effects 5 stars
4/23/05 Quigley some of the most stunning visual effects ever seen makes this better than The Matrix 5 stars
4/14/05 Indrid Cold CGI and Matrix-style slomo has long since ceased to amaze, and a dull plot can't save it. 3 stars
3/24/05 Mel Gibson AW HELL NAWWWWW!!! 4 stars
3/14/05 albert VERY GOOD MOVIE 5 stars
2/04/05 Valerie White interesting 3 stars
2/04/05 LilyM Forgettable; didn't deliver on story or action. 3 stars
2/01/05 lisa w It was better than the previews made it look. Lots of cool special effects too 4 stars
1/27/05 Jack Scallops Great action, needs a better script though 4 stars
1/27/05 New Jersey Rules Fun ass shit. 4 stars
1/11/05 Ron Newbold I don't think Issac Asimov would have envisioned I, Robot quite like this 3 stars
1/11/05 HL Dumb, But Visually Great..So, Do the Dube and Watch it! 5 stars
12/30/04 Tjalda L. Schiel Wowza special effects. Who cares if the plot is a mess. 4 stars
12/27/04 Samuel it's okay, nothing special... 3 stars
12/22/04 farnqwo product placement & dumbass plot 1 stars
12/20/04 axtion movie fan man vs robots\\great f/x in exciting sci/fi one of 2004's better films 4 stars
12/04/04 jonny boy cmon it wasnt that bad(look at the matrix sequels lmao) 3 stars
11/21/04 ad pretty scenery 4 stars
11/14/04 keithers.. How many times has this plot been done....to many to count 2 stars
11/11/04 Andrea yawn...boring, boring...boring. Will Smith NOT BELIEVABLE! 2 stars
11/09/04 Dan Van Zan Awesome Action Sequences manage to hold the movie inspite of a weak storyline 4 stars
11/04/04 Duncan yes Will unbutton the shirt and go back to action, Ali didnt get you the oscar 1 stars
9/15/04 TeeJay Terrible. And I will never be able to wear black Converse again. 1 stars
9/06/04 Ame blower ITS TOTAL SHIT 1 stars
8/30/04 The Predator watchable, good entertainment, it was ok 3 stars
8/28/04 HitmanThomas Better then I thought it would be 4 stars
8/27/04 Tristynn Sonny stole the show. I was pleasantly surprised by this movie...very original. 5 stars
8/25/04 Littlepurch Wel I loved it.As a fan of Minority Report,I feel this is a clever tribute with gr8 action! 5 stars
8/23/04 Sam Was expecting a good Sci-Fi Movie...not as mentioned, Black Vs. White. 1 stars
8/20/04 S.F Enjoyable. Haven't read the book. Kinda like the fact that it actually had a storyline! 4 stars
8/17/04 Destiny Pifer Good sci-fi flick will smith did a good job 4 stars
8/16/04 khurshid I kindda like it, need some love scene between spooner and Dr.calvin 4 stars
8/15/04 Peter James Excellent CGI, but is that really what the world will look like in thirty years...no way 3 stars
8/13/04 Obi Wan Good Summer Fun! Wasn't bad. CGI was very good and the film did move 4 stars
8/13/04 David Rare. I enjoyed it. 5 stars
8/11/04 Simon Khalil The perfect mix of action, comedy, and futuristic technology 4 stars
8/10/04 Clayton Smith The ending was a shocker, why return the robot army back to unlocked containers outside the 3 stars
8/10/04 Anthony G I sure want to buy some CONVERSE 2004, AND HAVE THEM SHIPPED FROM FED EX 1 stars
8/08/04 Jim Good stuff. Robots most compelling characters though! 4 stars
8/05/04 Mix Master Mason Will Smith has played this same painful character in every movie he's been in. Will sucks! 1 stars
8/03/04 Michael Very interesting, eye-popping, glad i didn't read books first... I would pay full price! 5 stars
8/02/04 P.Rodriguez Avoid like the plague. 1 stars
8/01/04 SIr Spam-a-lot Better than I expected (thought kinda simlar to ANIMATRIX: THE RENAISSANCE PART 1) 3 stars
8/01/04 Rocky Swarming killer robots made Will Smith barely tolerable for once 4 stars
7/30/04 alien assassin much better than "Bicentennial Man", but a long way behind "Blade Runner" 4 stars
7/28/04 michaelb14 a little less of the will smith persona would have been better but still... 4 stars
7/28/04 Zefram Mann Fairly intelligent story. Good effects. If you don't hate Smith, you'll probably like this. 4 stars
7/27/04 Mike Devans Average.. give it a whirl 3 stars
7/27/04 toonz not bad 4 stars
7/25/04 Agent Sands 10, 15 times better than I thought it would be. Really smart & fun. 5 stars
7/25/04 othree 2035? my ass, crappy story, Will looks buff, a DVD renter! 3 stars
7/25/04 M The fresh prince still cant act and he might have great abs, worth a look though. 3 stars
7/25/04 Pure RAGE... It was pretty good and the Max Payne styled shootouts were great! 5 stars
7/25/04 Nikolai The epilogue blended well with the screaming fat ladies and Ford van swiping me homebound 3 stars
7/23/04 buddy garrett No inspiration for this movie 1 stars
7/23/04 E Loved it. Real fun movie! 5 stars
7/22/04 malcolm basically a 2nd rate Blade Runner, and Smith is no Harrison Ford, still fun though 4 stars
7/22/04 Frink If you've seen one Will Smith action movie, you've seen them all... 3 stars
7/21/04 Virginia Clarke Exciting and frightening, itt made me think about the risks of artificial intelligence. 5 stars
7/21/04 ad it's actually ok - spectacular enough 4 stars
7/21/04 Nobody Laura- I hate to break it to you but Asimov has been dead for over 10 years. 4 stars
7/21/04 Kristina Sucked harder than two gays at an Nsync concert. 1 stars
7/20/04 Northerly Who's 85yo. sarcastro is very desperate 3 stars
7/20/04 Roy Again 99% Will Smith, 1% Asimov. And it's Wild Wild West/MIB 2 Smith at that. 3 stars
7/20/04 April Gupton i'll pass on this one 3 stars
7/20/04 Laura Shangraw Not worth my time 2 stars
7/20/04 Rkm Lame, lacking in depth like all Smith's films 1 stars
7/20/04 Travis Shotwell obviously the story of TRON.will smith=FLYNN, sonny=TRON,big computer=MCP, ownerguy=SARK. 4 stars
7/19/04 Northerly Northerly 3 Sunline 0 Pinkline has no clue 3 stars
7/19/04 Maz Fun romp, nothing new, but deeper (if you look) than a regular summer movie 5 stars
7/19/04 N. Christopher Bell The only people who won't like this movie are going to be the Star Trek Faggots. 4 stars
7/19/04 herkos akhaion Can you spell Recycled? SOS! 3 stars
7/19/04 doug r If anybody remembers all the robot stories, this movie pretty much covers all the bases... 4 stars
7/18/04 Rocky Entertaining, cool themes 4 stars
7/18/04 Titus Not the best thing ever, but a good fun movie. Smith has grown up. 4 stars
7/18/04 peel umm...i liked it. and you guys cant review movies worth shit...or something 5 stars
7/18/04 Cassandra Farrar over the top 2 stars
7/17/04 JDC cliched even for an action pic 2 stars
7/17/04 ajay typical actiion flick... I can't wait to read the book which WILL be miles better. 3 stars
7/17/04 Exhosinmyhead Fun movie to watch. Dont get caught up in all the technicalities. Good. 4 stars
7/17/04 KingNeutron The people who wrote this movie should be shot. Stop insulting and twisting Asimov. 2 stars
7/17/04 The Talking Elbow "Grishnakh" ?? Are you from Shadowclan Orcs? Email me epochii@aol.com 3 stars
7/17/04 Grishnakh Will Smith + Sci-Fi = Garbage / MiB, ID4, SUCKED ! I, Robot is a complete insult to Asimov. 1 stars
7/17/04 Onyeabo Monago Didn't like the movie. Lots of cgi, cliche storyline. 1 stars
7/17/04 legend The movie is an insult to the book! It was bad. 2 stars
7/17/04 Rocky I enjoyed it, nice visuals, entertaining, kinda' hokey, .not GREATjust GOOD 3 stars
7/16/04 Alex ¿¿¿¿???? 2 stars
7/16/04 Amerigo Vespukey Could have been social commentary. Instead, crap. Boooooo. 2 stars
7/16/04 Richard A two hour shoe commercial - do you have your Concords now? 3 stars
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  16-Jul-2004 (PG-13)
  DVD: 24-May-2005



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