I forgive my dad for liking this movie, but I hate myself for buying it many years ago. Well fuck, I was a little brat, I used to take all kinds of shit. Thank God I grew up. This movie is so bad so embarrassingly bad, so stupidly, horrifying, ridiculously bad, that you’ll spend most of your time shaking your head and grabbing your forehead and saying, “God, why?” At first I’d defend it a little, since I never thought it was THAT bad, but after seeing it again, I decided against it, and I think I sucks, and I think it’s a worthless piece of shit.So, the film is about this gangster fuck Angelo “Snaps” Provolone (Sylvester Stallone, who is surprisingly good), who is called upon, by his father, Eduardo (Kirk Douglas, practically the only one other than Sly worth viewing in this film), who’s dying, but before he dies, Eduardo makes his son swear that he’ll leave the gangster life. He does so a month later, and in one day, one fucking day, everything gets caught up in a terrible shitstorm of “funny” mishaps. His daughter Lisa (Marisa Tomei, ugh) wanting to get married, her fake daughter, black bags, his English teacher Dr. Poole (Tim Curry), his asshole bodyguards Aldo (Peter Riegert) and Connie (Chazz Palminteri), and all other types of shit. Oh, and he wants to be a banker now. Laugh.
"As Embarrassing As It Gets"
All right, granted, this movie has some funny moments, especially from Palminteri in his role of Connie, and those Finucci brothers, and the hilarious bag exchange sequence. I think that this is the only comedy where Sly can act. Fuck that Razzie, I enjoyed him here.
But the rest is left for waste. There are so many stupid scenes in the movie enough to shot this film apart. The standout is ALL the scenes that include the skint of Marisa Tomei. Jesus Fucking Christ, she’s so fucking annoying, that I just wanted to fast-forward the film to the next scene. Her acting was more than enough that if I were to watch this movie in at theater, I’d sure as hell walk out and ask for my money back. She was so irritating, gosh, that I was desperate to go again and watch My Cousin Vinny to remind me again that she can act, but back then she didn’t. Another factor is that fucking annoying music that plays along during the film also irritated me since it was loud, corny and stupid. There were many stupid scenes in the film that were very fucking annoying. The settings are too colorful, and look more like you were looking at a 1930’s France (the play’s originality), than wherever city that the film is taking place
The cast, most of the cast was cardboard. Don Ameche is wasted here, and so is Tim Curry. Come to think of it, though, that Curry wastes himself. Stallone is all right, Tomei is crap, Vincent Spano is all right, but the rest is just reciting their lines. John Landis just went fucky after this film. This is one film you don’t want to show in your resume. Wait, what the hell I’m talking about? He’s already a has-been. Tough shit.In the end, what else is there to say, the film is awful, as awful as any movie can get, though not as bad as Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot, but still bad. Die-hard Stallone fans will like it, but the masses will hate it. Okay, so it falls in the “So Bad it’s Good” category for fans of bad movies, but in my opinion, this isn’t worth a rent.
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originally posted: 01/20/02 22:22:58