Jamie Kennedy's favorite movie review site
Home Reviews  Articles  Release Dates Coming Soon  DVD  Top 20s Criticwatch  Search
Public Forums  Festival Coverage  Contests About 
Advertisement

Overall Rating
4.35

Awesome: 41.67%
Worth A Look55%
Just Average: 1.67%
Pretty Crappy: 0%
Sucks: 1.67%

6 reviews, 24 user ratings


Latest Reviews

Star Wars: Episode VIII : The Last Jedi by Jay Seaver

Darkest Hour by Jay Seaver

Shape of Water, The by Jay Seaver

I, Tonya by Rob Gonsalves

Wonder Wheel by Peter Sobczynski

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri by Rob Gonsalves

Swindlers, The by Jay Seaver

Oro (Gold) by Jay Seaver

Disaster Artist, The by Peter Sobczynski

Explosion by Jay Seaver

subscribe to this feed


Protector, The (2006)
[AllPosters.com] Buy posters from this movie
by EricDSnider

"Dude, where's my elephant?"
4 stars

"Ong-Bak: The Thai Warrior" was hugely popular in certain circles because of star Tony Jaa's stunning talent for martial arts, gymnastics and acrobatics. He also worked without stunt doubles, wires or computer trickery, making his on-screen feats even more extraordinary.

On the strength of that film, The Weinstein Company snagged U.S. rights for its followup, "The Protector," again starring Jaa and again directed by Prachya Pinkaew. In fact, the Weinsteins loved "The Protector" so much that they chopped 25 minutes out of it, randomly chose scenes and dialogue to dub with atrocious English, and rendered the whole thing nearly incomprehensible. Hurray for the Weinsteins and their devotion to world cinema!

The original Thai version is available on DVD (you can buy it from Amazon here), and I'm curious to watch it and see what was cut out of the American release. There are numerous scenes that end abruptly and others that start with the action already begun. Some of the Thai characters have inexplicably had their dialogue dubbed into English even while other people in the same scene continue to speak in subtitled Thai. What's more, there are Australian characters who spoke English to begin with who were STILL dubbed with new voices. What, the Australian actors didn't speak English well enough?

'Tis a shame so much vandalism has been done to the film, because the bedraggled scraps that remain suggest there was once a loopy, adrenaline-filled fight flick here. What we're getting is still fun -- most of the straight-ahead fight scenes seem to be more or less intact -- but it's often laughable in its incoherence. I fear many viewers won't realize that's not how the movie was when it left Thailand and that the damage occurred during shipping.

Here's what we have: Jaa plays Cam, a lad trained in the art of Muay-Thai, a vicious fighting style that seems to emphasize breaking the arms and legs of one's opponents. (In one intentionally over-the-top scene recalling one of The Bride's adventures from "Kill Bill," Cam cracks about 30 limbs on at least that many enemies, each injury accompanied by a brutal KRRRRK on the soundtrack.) Muay-Thai fighters are especially prized as guardians of the king's royal elephants, which are believed to have spiritual powers.

Well, wouldn't you know it, some bad guys kill Cam's dad and steal his elephants, a father-and-son pair named Por-Yai and Kohrn, whisking them away to Australia, where their fate is unknown. Cam must head south, therefore, to retrieve the pachyderms and avenge his father's death.

Except for the part where it involves elephants, it's pretty much your basic Hero's Journey. Cam remains admirably focused on the task at hand, not stopping to fall in love with a local girl or solve a mystery or any of the other things that often distract heroes. No, what he does is run around Sydney yelling, "Where is my elephant?!"

Most of the plot-oriented sequences -- especially a lame subplot involving a Thai-born Australian police detective (Petchtai Wongkamlao) and a ring of dirty cops -- are forgettable, often plagued with corny jokes like "My grandmother drives faster than you -- and she's dead!" The movie appears to have been shot on the cheapest, grainiest film available. The acting is not, how shall we say, noteworthy.

But when the fight scenes, choreographed by Jaa himself, kick in, boy howdy. He leaps, he nearly flies, he moves with lightning speed, he executes his maneuvers with precision and fury. Pinkaew avoids extraneous cutting and choppy editing, allowing us to see what Jaa is doing without a lot of distraction. In one ingeniously staged scene, Pinkaew follows Jaa as he fights his way to the top floor of a hotel, taking on opponents, sending people over banisters, breaking through walls -- and it's all shot in one continuous 4-minute take. The amount of work involved in staging such a long, complicated shot is mind-boggling, and that's aside from the awesomeness of what actually happens in it.

At the end of the film a reporter asks a city official about all the mayhem that's occurred in the city that day: "Can you comment on reports of a Thai man in a red scarf, and a baby elephant?" So obviously the movie doesn't want us to take it too seriously, though I do wonder: Once he retrieves his pachyderms, how will Cam get them back to Thailand? You can't even take mouthwash on an airplane. You think they're going to let you take elephants? But who knows, before the Weinsteins got their hands on it, maybe the movie explained that.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=14709&reviewer=247
originally posted: 09/10/06 04:08:27
[printer] printer-friendly format  

User Comments

5/11/17 komal shah Bahubali 2 likely to rake in Rs 1,000 crore 5 stars
3/16/09 Josie Cotton is a goddess Amazing! 5 stars
7/14/07 Jason great movie, even without a plot! 5 stars
5/18/07 David Pollastrini great action 3 stars
3/01/07 Dark Enchatress Tony Jaa is killer! Great movie!!! 5 stars
1/17/07 action movie fan outstanding martial arts fight scenes-tony jaa rukles but plot line is a bit thin 4 stars
12/01/06 Amit man the action was awesome!!! 5 stars
11/10/06 Woody Best martial arts ever... but i could take him 5 stars
11/09/06 Jason Best martial art movie of the year! 5 stars
10/17/06 Zeke Torres SWEET! 5 stars
9/30/06 Kim Gerrohn Actions were so great! 5 stars
9/17/06 Covell The kung fu sequences are frigg'n amazing that yeah, Tony Jaa is better then Bruce Lee 5 stars
9/16/06 randommoviedude If you like Porno, you will love this movie. All action/ no story or character development 1 stars
9/15/06 TheGreatMacsby BEST martial arts film yet........ever! Villains were as good as hero! 5 stars
9/14/06 MDs. I like it 4 stars
9/12/06 Jorge Coronilla Awesome film. I loved it. 5 stars
9/12/06 mary wonderful and very good movie-The martial arts used was awesome 5 stars
9/11/06 KingNeutron There are an incredible number of 'Daaaaamn!' moments in this film. 4 stars
9/08/06 BrianDePalma This movie contains the very best fight scenes in the history of cinema 5 stars
8/13/06 Darth Vader Extraordinary fights - Jaa is better than Bruce Lee 5 stars
7/31/06 paul this movie is truely amazing 5 stars
7/14/06 Chris Good God... simply amazing 5 stars
6/19/06 Ginger Jaa Rulez 5 stars
6/17/06 Vega Incredible fight scenes make this movie a classic. Nobody bothers about the story 5 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
Note: Duplicate, 'planted,' or other obviously improper comments
will be deleted at our discretion. So don't bother posting 'em. Thanks!
Your Name:
Your Comments:
Your Location: (state/province/country)
Your Rating:


Discuss this movie in our forum

USA
  08-Sep-2006 (R)
  DVD: 16-Jan-2007

UK
  N/A (15)

Australia
  N/A




Home Reviews  Articles  Release Dates Coming Soon  DVD  Top 20s Criticwatch  Search
Public Forums  Festival Coverage  Contests About 
Privacy Policy | | HBS Inc. |   
All data and site design copyright 1997-2017, HBS Entertainment, Inc.
Search for
reviews features movie title writer/director/cast