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Overall Rating
3.13

Awesome: 16.67%
Worth A Look34.21%
Just Average: 16.67%
Pretty Crappy: 10.53%
Sucks: 21.93%

7 reviews, 72 user ratings


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Never Been Kissed
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by Erik Childress

"Drew's Latest More Juvenile Than Sweet"
2 stars

Never Been Kissed (**) - Never Been Kissed is a film that wants to capture some of the same notes that were struck with the John Hughes teen movies of the 80s before he started writing passages about robbers getting hit in the nuts (no offense to Home Alone). I was looking forward to this movie - not as something that I expected to put on my top ten list - but just a pleasant entertainment that would have me laughing throughout and keep me entertained for close to two hours.

Well, I did laugh during the movie. I particularly enjoyed Drew Barrymoreís marijuana-induced dance sequence. This was a huge disappointment for me. This could have been a great underdog story. A great romance. A great comedy. Instead, Never Been Kissed ends up playing like the 90s version of Just One of the Guys. Remember that film from 1985. Itís always on cable and is one of the guiltiest pleasures of the 80s teen films. That film was about a high school girl who goes undercover in another high school (as a guy) to write a story for a journalism competition. She even has a horny loser brother who supplies most of the comedy. Now itís 1999 and weíve got the Drew Barrymore version. She plays a copy editor for the Chicago Sun-Times who has never quite got beyond her traumas from being picked on big time in high school. Her early scenes in the film show that Barrymore does have some range as an actress and its the early scenes that I enjoyed the most before the film actually gets to the high school where we are left with lame jokes about fashion and popularity vs. Geekdom. How original. But because I was drawn in - I was prepared to cut the film a little bit of slack. But slowly throughout the picture I was struck with the harsh reality that this film really didnít have anything to offer. And perhaps that was a good thing on my part - because I was afraid that the film was going to cover a few points that Iím currently covering in a script Iím writing for Disney. Luckily the script isnít too good. Like the Barrymore character, the script really has no idea what kind of story it wants her to write. The whole article becomes basically an afterthought throughout the film and only resurfaces late as the film decides it wants to create a juicy scandal, which is really just an excuse to create the obligatory break-up scene between Barrymore and the love interest. I also felt odd about the way the film dealt with this love interest - the cute English teacher who as far as he knows is much older than the Barrymore/student character. This is handled nicely in one sequence on a Ferris wheel but then gets really weird when the truth is revealed and the teacher says to her (because she has lied to him) - ďI canít look at you the same way anymore.Ē What? Hello!!! Someone get me Humbert Humbert on the phone. With all the 80ís music frequently popping up here and there - I was expecting to hear the Policeís ďDonít Stand So Close to MeĒ during this scene. On the plus side, I did like the Prom theme of famous couples throughout history - but was then a little weirded out when I saw Siskel and Ebert costumes there (Was this couple gay or just there by themselves?) I want to say that I liked the whole Drew Barrymore performance, but I found myself having an odd reaction to it during the later scenes. She starts off as a frigid yet ambitious newspaper reporter, but later starts whining to her boss like a junior high student, when her job is threatened. The film also doesnít earn the ending it presents - the romantic aspect of it anyway - which could have worked in a better written film. But something else troubled me about the ending as well - and thatís the hypocrisy of it. Itís not the only film to do it - but it presented me with a Vietnam-style flashback to a high school retreat I went to Junior year. (I went to Driscoll Catholic). During that retreat, one evening, all 45 of us (half the class) weíre brought into a large room with a fireplace. We were then asked to stand up one at a time, go to a chair in the front of the room, and mention one thing that was bothering us about school, life, personal problems, etcÖ It was basically a big get in touch with your feelings session where most of the popular kids talked about how they wish everyone could just get along and what not. My good friend, Dan, and myself, recognizing the hypocrisy of this whole moment refused to participate. At the end, Dan made a speech, without moving from his original spot on the floor, saying how he wished that everyone in the room could follow everything that everyone had just said through on. It was an awesome impromptu speech and got a big round of applause at the end. Do you think anything changed on Monday at school. Donít think too hard. But I digress - back to the ending at hand.

Everyone has either dumped on Barrymore or now hates her for being a reporter yet she writes her big article and everyone from the school is at the big baseball game to cheer her on as she waits for her first kiss - maybe. Are they really being supportive - or is it just a chance to be on TV. Just once - Iíd like to see a film like this go on another 10 minutes - just to see what class is like on Monday.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=1556&reviewer=198
originally posted: 02/15/00 17:10:30
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User Comments

6/22/10 PAUL SHORTT MILDLY AMUSING BUT MUDDLED 2 stars
1/09/09 Anonymous. a cute little movie that alot of us can relate to, in one way or another. :] 4 stars
11/27/08 little Red I love this movie 5 stars
8/28/08 Shaun Wallner This ones ok. 3 stars
11/12/06 cody a pretty cool movie that remains everbody how bad highschool was. 3/5 3 stars
8/02/05 love not realistic, but still adorable, love you drew 4 stars
10/22/04 Hilary Adamson What planet can Chris Parry be from,hating this&liking 10 things I hate about you? 5 stars
6/03/04 Jim Main characters are sad sacks; their mooning over teenagers is just creepy. 1 stars
4/08/04 phoenix I so want Jessica Alba to suck my cock bone dry. 4 stars
2/20/04 Santa Monica Yu Mora 387.St,Kentucky Locations 5 stars
3/23/03 Santa Monica Yu Mora 387.St,Kentucky Locations 4 stars
2/26/03 R.W. Welch Pretty familiar routine teen stuff which nonetheless made mucho $$ 3 stars
2/07/03 Alyssa Young I loved the movie. Drew Barrymore was awesome. 5 stars
1/03/03 Matt Leblanc & Monica Yu Mora 387.St,Kentucky Locations 5 stars
12/21/02 Pigwidgeon Mainly a showcase for the eternal Drew Barrymore. Excellent music. The rest, so-so. 4 stars
8/25/02 Retarded Homo Yeah Jessica Alba is fuckalicious! I wanna take a shit in her mouth, yeah, chow my turds! 5 stars
6/04/02 hassan zafar good 5 stars
5/23/02 Kristen great fun 4 stars
5/21/02 Professor Shithead True Hollywood shit in the grand tradition 1 stars
5/20/02 siro Why do chicks dig Drew Barrymore so much??? Let's be honest -- she SUCKS!!! 1 stars
4/30/02 Phoenix Jessica Alba is so fuckable. Damn I want to fuck her in the ass, and have her suck my cock. 4 stars
4/26/02 esfse SUCKS! 1 stars
4/03/02 hannah fun, light, and happy ending. Loved it! Loved it! 5 stars
3/27/02 Sery I thought this movie was really cute. 4 stars
3/23/02 verbina King of the Bros: You are an IDIOT. WORST REVIEW EVER 4 stars
3/21/02 chris Jesus this movie fucking sucks so much ass Drew sucks ass 1 stars
1/30/02 Jessica Davis I'd be a Drew Barrymore fan if she were always like this! Charming! Hope casters take note. 4 stars
7/26/01 moviegoer Full of heart and humor. While it had it's umm... strange moments, I found it wonderful. 4 stars
4/16/01 LiL This was great, funny and had Drew Barrymore in it 4 stars
4/11/01 totally contrived, better than it should be thanks to Drew Barrymore's charm. 3 stars
4/09/01 Gary This is a really good movie. Drew Barrymore's best I think! 4 stars
3/27/01 saucy terrible!!! terrible!!! terrible!!! 1 stars
3/11/01 *~Danielle*Ophelia~* (formerly KyLe*BrOfLoVsKi) Okay, kill me if you must, but I really loved this movie. I even RELATED to it!! 5 stars
2/20/01 Rocket Boy Horrible, Drew Barrymore at her worst, which--is pretty bad. 1 stars
9/28/00 The King of the Bros You want informative? How's this, YOU SUCK! 1 stars
9/09/00 Bob Fugate As a reviewer you are neither informative nor funny, what you are is a loser. 4 stars
9/03/00 Bill McNeal Some embarassing jokes, but it's incredibly sweet & Drew is very charismatic 5 stars
8/10/00 Bender Decent teeny bopper fluff. 3 stars
8/02/00 Elvisfan so awful that i am amazed it got released to the public at all 1 stars
6/07/00 Alma Marquez Man the guy who said that this movie is fuckig rufus is fucking right thi movie sucks 1 stars
6/06/00 Michael Grimm average entertainment, few laughs 3 stars
5/30/00 natasha disturbing-- even if she was 25, he was her teacher and didn't know it 3 stars
4/08/00 Amber Marie Schubert The movie was awesome and the teacher was hot 5 stars
3/18/00 Jed OK teenie flick 3 stars
3/12/00 Richard Wright Tries to be charming and sweet, but instead is manipulative and thoughily irritating. Yuck. 2 stars
1/21/00 kmk i love drew barrymore, but this movie is pitiful 1 stars
9/16/99 strike The flashbacks were truthful, but still this is formulaic and the finale was childish. 2 stars
8/14/99 Mac Barrymore is excellent 5 stars
7/22/99 John Lyons Trite & predictable 3 stars
7/18/99 TOMB AMAZING 5 stars
7/08/99 MRHOLLYWOOD !! Will strike a chord with some. Overall a very sweet and depressing film. 3 stars
7/05/99 Angie Drew Barrymore is the queen of teen stardom...absolutely adorable movie w/ real moral value 5 stars
7/02/99 Daria Absolutely contrived and predictable, but Drew made it a fantastic experience. 5 stars
6/14/99 David Drew makes this one watchable; without her, the lame predictable story would suck all ass. 2 stars
5/26/99 darren Ack. Ptui. I walked out after 20 minutes and got my money back. 1 stars
5/14/99 Javachik Drew looked horrid, plot was totally incapable of happening, end was kinda nice 2 stars
5/09/99 Murrieta Man Possibly the worst film I have every seen. 1 stars
4/29/99 Sentaia E Very nice, but it kinda scared me... 5 stars
4/29/99 Goddess It was pretty good. Rufus! 4 stars
4/29/99 Angie Adorable movie!! Drew was a gem!! 5 stars
4/25/99 Mr Showbiz Who knew Drew Barrymore was a world class prat-faller? 5 stars
4/24/99 aoakely13 chick flick but okay 3 stars
4/21/99 Jessica THIS WAS THE BEST MOVIE!!!! MICHEAL VARTAN IS SOOO HHHHOOOOOTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
4/18/99 Malbert Who is this Michael Vartan guy? he was great, as was Drew B. 4 stars
4/17/99 ladyace a mishmash of the truman show & every other teen movie; the cool cast is wasted! 2 stars
4/15/99 Dave Drew kicks ass! 3 stars
4/10/99 mara funny movie. drew stirs your empathetic nature. dave arq. VERY cute in tightie whities. 4 stars
4/06/99 Hannah Leach It's really interesting 4 stars
4/06/99 Michael Grimm good beginning and middle, but the end? 4 stars
4/02/99 E Essentially an ensemble piece, with Arquette as another high-school drop in. 3 stars
4/01/99 Rodger Fun film. Moves well. Drew is great. But the wheels fall off at the end. 4 stars
3/30/99 The Graduate A sweet, entertaining flick--Drew is very watchable 4 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  09-Apr-1999 (PG-13)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  01-Jul-1999 (M)




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