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Overall Rating
2.25

Awesome: 3.57%
Worth A Look: 7.14%
Just Average30.36%
Pretty Crappy: 28.57%
Sucks30.36%

4 reviews, 32 user ratings


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Someone Like You
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by EricDSnider

"It's a 'date movie.' Which means it's kind of dumb but mostly harmless."
3 stars

The message of "Someone Like You" is that all men are pigs, except for the few who aren't.

That's the overt message. The more subtle message is that this is a "date movie." It doesn't have too much sex or profanity or violence, so it's tame enough for mixed company. And it's all about romance, which is allegedly enjoyed by women ("enjoyable to women" being the current definition of "date movie").

This particular date movie is about a Manhattan gal named Jane (Ashley Judd) who works for a tabloid talk show and is, you guessed it, unlucky at love. She takes up with new coworker Ray (Greg Kinnear) and is about to move in with him when he suddenly dumps her.

Then she hits on a theory, which she calls the New Cow Theory, and which she has been explaining to us in voice-over narration the whole time. The idea is that once a bull has done the deed with a cow, he doesn't want that cow anymore. Even if he's not gettin' it from someone else, he'd rather have no nookie at all than nookie from an "old cow."

Men, Jane decides, are like bulls. They get bored easily, and they want to find new cows.

Marvelous! The women are really enjoying the movie now, and the men they're with are still concentrating on how to get some action afterward.

Jane tries to make Ray jealous by moving in, platonically, with another coworker. This one is Eddie (Hugh Jackman), a notorious womanizer and sleazeball. But wouldn't you know it? He has a sensitive side, evidenced by his bringing Jane some booze to ease the pain when she's crying over her lost Ray.

Ray also once had a serious live-in girlfriend, whom he encounters and gets all awkward with in one very brief scene. The movie does several shorthand tricks like that, hoping to convince us of things with as little effort as possible, leaving more time to deal with Jane's saucy friend Liz (Marisa Tomei), who works at a women's magazine and has Jane start writing pseudonymous columns about this New Cow Theory.

The four main stars perform as these particular ones always do: fairly good, fairly charming, fairly enjoyable. Nothing more, nothing less. Jackman occasionally has an Australian accent, but I guess that's the dialogue coach's fault, not his.

The movie's main problem is that for a long time, it's unclear which couple we're supposed to be rooting for: Judd and Kinnear, or Judd and Jackman. So much time was spent developing Judd and Kinnear that when he dumps her, for a while we think we really do want them to get back together. But then Jackman comes on the scene, and it's obvious the movie, if it was made anywhere near Hollywood, is going to have the compassionate, platonic friend come to the rescue, as always.

There's also the issue of not being very funny, and the whole anonymous-columnist thing getting quite ridiculous. But those are beside the point. It's a date movie; what do you want?

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=1869&reviewer=247
originally posted: 03/26/01 21:02:48
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User Comments

1/25/17 Suzanne Weak plot, but Ashley and Hugh ARE cute together 3 stars
9/30/10 PAUL SHORTT PREDICTABLE AND FORMULAIC 1 stars
1/27/10 Luisa Good chick flick 4 stars
12/06/07 Gigi This is a fantastic movie; and any movie critic who calls this crap IS fooling himself. 4 stars
10/23/04 Jenna Furr Cock-and-bull theory shows up Trashley Dudd as a sore loser. 1 stars
9/14/04 Marvin Totally lame, but TWISTED makes me pine for this the good ol days of Ashley Judd's career! 2 stars
4/26/04 Wendy Jones How does a total crap film have a saving grace, Jack Somersby? 2 stars
3/30/04 Faustus It is what it is. Nothing earth-shattering, but nothing totally offensive, either. 3 stars
11/24/03 Ernestine Ashley Judd is an overrated skank with a brattitude. 2 stars
7/24/03 Shadaan Feleli Except for the totaly pointless talkshow ending sequence i loved the film. 4 stars
7/11/03 Sixteen Yoke of Oxygen Actually Eric, "date movie" means the last kind of movie I'd wanna be stuck with a date at! 2 stars
4/25/03 Valerie Cameron How can Ashley Judd be so anal-retentive! Does she use Krazy Glue? 2 stars
4/16/03 Y. Roger Gregory And they say Ashley Crudd is gonna be in four films in 2002. Groan, groan! 2 stars
4/07/03 Jack Sommersby Pandering-down-to-and-audience dreck. Jackman is film's saving grace. 1 stars
4/01/03 Jenna Furr Cock-and-bull theory shows up Trashley Dudd as a sore loser. 1 stars
10/09/02 TheOthersFan sad 2 stars
9/03/02 The Chronic Mastubator I truly despise Ashley Judd. She can't act for shit, and this movie is equally fucking lame 1 stars
9/02/02 AshFan Hugh Jackman's cool, and it has laughs, but it's a chick flick. 3 stars
8/10/02 karen goldstein I normaly like these lame girly movies but this one is waaaay too pathetic! 1 stars
6/10/02 Me zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........... 1 stars
4/25/02 AgentDS Threee words: Hugh Jackman shirtless. 'Nuff Said. 5 stars
3/16/02 Y. Roger Gregory And they say Ashley Crudd is gonna be in four films in 2002. Groan, groan! 2 stars
1/26/02 Valerie Cameron How can Ashley Judd be so anal-retentive? Does she use Krazy glue? 2 stars
1/03/02 KMG Hugh, forget your wife,,,spread my legs and put your hot 9 incher in my puss! 3 stars
7/26/01 Clara was pretty bad, took a nose dive in the last 10min. and i usually like romantic comedys 2 stars
5/14/01 MARK J. INGEMI I saw the movie twice , & I thought that the entire cast gave a wonderful performace. 5 stars
4/16/01 Truth Will Set You Free Ahhh, Judd has very curvy body. I love the way her beautiful ass curves. 1 stars
4/16/01 JustJeff I'd rather watch Greg Kinnear cheat with Hugh Jackman - this movie sucked my left nut. 1 stars
4/12/01 MJA Ashley Judd callsin her performance in this ultra-formulaic piece of garbage. 1 stars
4/05/01 jay Ashley Judd carries this ideal date movie . 4 stars
4/04/01 Katsat Judd & Jackman very charming & appealing but story & direction lacking. 3 stars
3/31/01 James Ashley Judd needs play roles where she is mute 1 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  30-Mar-2001

UK
  N/A

Australia
  12-Jul-2001 (M)


Directed by
  Tony Goldwyn

Written by
  Elizabeth Chandler

Cast
  Ashley Judd
  Greg Kinnear
  Hugh Jackman
  Ellen Barkin
  Marisa Tomei
  Hugh Downs



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