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Overall Rating
1.79

Awesome: 6.25%
Worth A Look: 9.82%
Just Average: 7.14%
Pretty Crappy: 9.82%
Sucks66.96%

5 reviews, 82 user ratings


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Crossroads (2002)
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by EricDSnider

"Britney can sort of act, and the movie is sort of not terrible."
3 stars

“Crossroads” begins with Britney Spears dancing around in her underwear. Later, she sings some songs. What more review do you want?

Not that any non-Britney fans were considering seeing this anyway, but it’s not as awful as it might have been. A non-Britney person might survive a screening with little harm done, except maybe for the last 15 minutes, which are as maudlin as any after-school special you can imagine.

Britney plays Lucy, a Georgia girl who is about to graduate from high school without ever having had much fun. Her over-protective father (Dan Aykroyd) wants her to become a doctor, but she wants to be a singer.

So does Mimi (Taryn Manning), Lucy’s one-time friend who has lately gone a separate path, insofar as she’s trailer trash and is several months pregnant. After graduation, Mimi’s heading for L.A. to audition for a record label, and she convinces Lucy and their other one-time friend, the snobby Kit (Zoe Saldana), to go with her.

To recap: These three former friends who hardly know each other anymore decide, at the drop of a hat, to travel cross-country. They do it in a car driven by Ben (Anson Mount), a hunky man they’ve just met who is rumored to have once killed someone. Not the brightest trio of femmes, but OK. The trip will give them a chance to bond, and for Lucy and Ben to fall in love.

It’s a road movie, then, and a juggulicious one at that, what with Britney wearing her skimpy outfits, and almost having sex a couple times, and wearing only a towel another time. You may think I’m a pervert for mentioning it, but trust me, these scenes appear in the film for no other reason than to get people’s attention. Obviously, it worked.

Britney’s not a bad actress; in fact, the times when she sings are the least enjoyable parts of the film. (One especially uncreative one has her singing karaoke while Kit and Mimi provide suspiciously well-choreographed unplanned dance moves.) Part of what’s made her so successful as a performer is that she knows how to put on a show. She has charm, as do most of her castmates.

The film’s major problem is that it doesn’t go anywhere. It’s allegedly about chasing your dreams, but that point isn’t made with much finesse, and there are far too many uninteresting detours along the way. Very little of what happens is the least bit probable, including the aforementioned finale, which very nearly derails the whole thing.

It’s not a terrible movie, though. Bland, yes, but not terrible. Britney fans are probably the right demographic for it, though their parents should be aware that there is teen sex and drinking in it. Allegedly, there are Britney fans who don’t have to ask their parents before seeing a movie, and I guess those people will like it, too.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=5756&reviewer=247
originally posted: 02/14/02 15:52:08
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User Comments

12/09/14 dr.lao "I'm not a girl, I'm not yet a woman" and you're no actress either 1 stars
6/03/08 IRIDIAN i loved it iv watched it like 10000000 times 5 stars
2/17/08 Tiffany Losco I liked this movie. It came out when I was a teenager. 4 stars
2/28/07 Beau not a masterpiece! but not sheer dumb either!!!! altho it was really a dumb movie 2 stars
2/22/07 David Pollastrini Britney was hot before she went Psycho! 1 stars
5/25/06 jon burton i loved the movie. It taught many very useful things. 5 stars
4/21/06 shalom mm the film is so good and so i love it only if i could see britney spears face to face 4 stars
1/02/06 Wiseman I was forced too watch ( my Girl friend ) I dumped her right after the movie. 1 stars
9/26/05 Anthony G I was so bored I had to whip out my dick to be entertained. 1 stars
9/17/05 tony Britney spears should fucking get murdered with a knife for this shit! 1 stars
8/30/05 ES Man and car full of girls, man turns on good music, girls whine, until bad music turned on 1 stars
8/06/05 Duffyboy666 Poor An acting debut really deserves better. 2 stars
7/20/05 Chris Even my mom hated it... 1 stars
6/14/05 Daveman Shit on a stick 1 stars
5/23/05 Dr. Lecter I wish bubonic plague on Spears 1 stars
5/08/05 melissa pathetic 1 stars
3/15/05 Chris Stephens Words can't describe how bad this is 1 stars
3/12/05 Charlene Javier Fell asleep immediately. 1 stars
3/08/05 pepperann224 movie is a waste of time. 1 stars
12/04/04 Kristina Williams Spears in her pink pnties can't even save this 1 stars
11/22/04 Natasha It was okay but Britney could have done a little better. 4 stars
7/23/04 Sandy Turynowicz not that good 3 stars
7/20/04 April Gupton I'd rather get a root canal than see this again 1 stars
7/18/04 lucas excellent 5 stars
7/13/04 Daveman Fairly well crafted considering the banal, cliched material. 2 stars
6/05/04 valerie hart she must of been desperate dnt give up ur day job it had nothing to it not worth a look 1 stars
5/07/04 Britney Spears into pruning hooks Britney's a better actor than singer but shouldn't get carried away quite yet. 4 stars
4/13/04 John Aster Habig She can't write songs, sing songs, play songs, dance or act she's a 5x threat 1 stars
1/24/04 Elena how are films like THIS made when there are real intelligent aspiring filmmakers out there? 1 stars
11/21/03 Amanda Too terrible for words 1 stars
11/12/03 Kitty B. get a like, jamie lynn!!! ur sister sucks and ure gonna hav 2 live with it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1 stars
8/30/03 Kitty Kelso i feel SOOOOO sorry 4 dan aykroyd. couldnt they've given a legend like him a bettr role??! 1 stars
7/15/03 your worst goddamn nightmare haha, i saw this with some buddies, the theatre was empty, c'ept for some ol' dude jackin' 2 stars
6/23/03 John Aster Habig The fact that Britney is bigger than Neil Young and Dustin Hoffman is simply blasphemous 1 stars
5/21/03 fartzrgood this movie kept me in stitches...or was that "On the Line"? 1 stars
5/03/03 Collin Britany Don't Go Away Mad, Just Go Away And Dont Make Any More Movies 1 stars
4/01/03 Jenna Furr Better that its year's best pic winner, SHITCAGO (but almost all 2002 flicks are). 4 stars
2/21/03 The Bint JESUS id rather cut off my head with a chainsaw and shove it up my ass than watch this shit 1 stars
1/10/03 Can't stand Britney Give this twit some Clearasil and send her on her way 1 stars
12/29/02 JhAtrai sux like britney on a record exec 1 stars
8/31/02 Phoenix I couldn't help but jerk-off looking at Britney in her underwear. I want to suck her tities 4 stars
8/03/02 KMG I WANT TO MOUNT ANSON! 3 stars
7/19/02 ! Britney acting.... I know enough 2 stars
7/10/02 .Choadushouse. THis movie wasn't as bad as i expected it to be. Plus the scantily Britney parts made good! 4 stars
5/26/02 I'm in (L) with a Jedi wats with the poem, im not a girl, not yet a woman? jesus, even britney could ave done bett 1 stars
5/21/02 Film Person I'm DEFINITELY not a Britney fan, but she did a good job in the movie. 4 stars
5/14/02 Stud CHICK FLIK!! 5 stars
4/29/02 Jack Off No stripping or raping? Damn, hows the underwear shots though? 4 stars
4/21/02 Film Dude FUCK YOU ANDREW, I'M NOT SEEING GLITTER OR ON THE LINE!!!! 1 stars
4/17/02 Claxner Oxjaw Whatyouknow? Some singers CAN act. Pleasant surprise from Britney! 4 stars
3/31/02 Nikki I'm not Britney's biggest fan, but this was a great movie. 5 stars
3/24/02 Jimmy Very Bad Movie 1 stars
3/13/02 john say hello to the razzies brit!joins matrix as a double header for bad movies 1 stars
3/07/02 STEVE FIRST THERE WAS CROUCHING TIGER, THEN THERE WAS PEARL HARBOR,NOW COMES CROSSROADS BIG WHUP 1 stars
3/01/02 Ong Yu Jian I think she should stick to singing & swinging her tits onstage. 1 stars
2/26/02 JJ Someone, please shoot that pop-tramp. YUCK! 1 stars
2/26/02 Whitney Absolute Crap 1 stars
2/23/02 Julie Even more dissapointing than I ever thought possible 1 stars
2/21/02 Cheryl YUCK! 1 stars
2/20/02 RKM Even my 13 yr old niece thought it went nowhere 1 stars
2/19/02 Chris K. Britney might look good, but her acting and singing are terrible. 1 stars
2/19/02 siro At certain points, I found myself wondering if the whole thing was just a sick joke.I wish. 1 stars
2/19/02 Jake a stupid vehicle. 1 stars
2/19/02 spankachu who told britany it would be a good idea to act? 1 stars
2/19/02 AK47 This is the second terrorist attack! 1 stars
2/19/02 Judith Latham Spyguy2 and Meryl K are ON THE MONEY!!! Their remarks had had me on the floor laughing!!!! 1 stars
2/18/02 KCobain Rampage pretty much sums it up for me. 1 stars
2/18/02 Rampage F**k you, Britney, and your stupid movie too. You suck! 1 stars
2/18/02 Daniela Francescone She was actually good! 5 stars
2/17/02 krista very good, I liked it and I'm not a britney fan 5 stars
2/17/02 Britney Fartknocker My 12 year old cousins hated this movie worse than me!! 1 stars
2/16/02 Spyguy2 B.S. is everything that's wrong with our culture. A lip-synching soulless corporate entity 1 stars
2/16/02 Bri ok movie-looked hot in underwear 4 stars
2/16/02 Meryl K. I want to drag that tramp out into the street and shoot her for forcing this upon us. 1 stars
2/16/02 Mel What else would u expect a britney movie to be? It's one huge slutty pepsi commercial 1 stars
2/15/02 kasey It has britany spears.I would rather be tided and forced towatch peal harbor 1 stars
2/15/02 White Rabbit I would rather set myself on fire than see this movie 1 stars
2/15/02 shelley smith Frighteningly bad, not even my neices wanted to see it. 1 stars
2/15/02 Todd Whoever Ok'd this movie should be tied down and beaten with a rubber hose. 1 stars
2/15/02 Joe Deblow Britney Spears like totally sucks and I hope she like gets hit by a bus 1 stars
2/14/02 jack This is like 2 hours of MTV. Wretched. 1 stars
2/11/02 Cyrus Britney Spears can't act so she plays the role of Britney Spears 1 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  15-Feb-2002 (PG-13)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  18-Apr-2002


Directed by
  Tamra Davis

Written by
  Shonda Rhimes

Cast
  Britney Spears
  Taryn Manning
  Dan Aykroyd
  Kim Cattrall
  Justin Long
  Anson Mount



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