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Overall Rating

Awesome: 2.17%
Worth A Look: 2.17%
Just Average: 23.91%
Pretty Crappy: 10.87%

3 reviews, 28 user ratings

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Ballistic: Ecks Vs Sever
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by EricDSnider

"Loud vs. Annoying"
1 stars

Even by dumb action-movie standards, "Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever" is a dumb action movie. It is yet another film whose director (Wych Kaosayananda) believes using slow-motion is enough to create excitement, and that fighting is the same thing as advancing the plot.

It is based on a video game, which I believe tells you everything you need to know. The story involves a bad guy whose son was kidnapped by his black-clad, butt-kicking employee, Sever (Lucy Liu), but she had good reasons for doing it. There's nanite technology that enables villains to assassinate people with the push of a button, miles away, and somehow the bad guy, Gant (Gregg Henry) is involved.

Oh, and Gant is married to Vinn (Talisa Soto), who used to be married to FBI agent Ecks (Antonio Banderas), but then she thought he died so she married this idiot. But Ecks wasn't dead, and now he's been harassed back into active duty so he can stop Sever, whose good-intentioned mission seems to include a lot of killing.

Eventually, they realize they are on the same side and both want Gant taken care of, and so it stops being Ecks vs. Sever and starts being Ecks and Sever, which is kind of heart-warming, in its way.

There is no acting in the movie. All the participants merely behave really seriously and say their silly dialogue with straight faces. And a lot of things get blown up. I mean, A LOT of things.

"Ballistic" is that it's a wan, pale imitation of an action movie. It looks more like a standard episode of some USA Network series that is light on brain and heavy on immature enthusiasm for mayhem. It has no flash or style or wit. It may not be the worst movie of the year, but it is almost certainly one of the most pointless.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=6132&reviewer=247
originally posted: 09/27/02 22:35:05
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User Comments

7/20/12 Quigley I've seen glaciers move faster than this film's plot. One of the most boring films ever. 1 stars
8/30/06 Jarkko Perälä This movie barely makes any sense 1 stars
6/09/05 malcolm as much ass as sexy lucy liu kicked, it just wasn't intersting 2 stars
1/05/05 D takes a little appreciating. 4 stars
1/04/05 Joe England Still, Lucy Liu is brilliant in her portrayal of an Easter Island head statue come to life. 1 stars
8/06/04 Samurai Z yes mate stickin your finger in your nostril much2 better than watcin thic megacrap!!! 1 stars
5/19/04 John hard to believe how bad this is 1 stars
4/09/04 Jack Sommersby As bad as its reputation has indicated. Godawful and inexcusable. 1 stars
3/27/04 Kev Worse than Battlefield Earth!!! 1 stars
1/23/04 Chloe Brody Definitely THE worst movie ever!!! 1 stars
1/19/04 michel Terrible in every aspect! Avoid this like the flu! 1 stars
10/12/03 Goofy Maxwell Coulda been Mad TV meets video game but Kaos takes it too seriously & gets lost in details. 2 stars
3/19/03 Andrew Carden Fantastic Action Scenes Overshadow A Contrived, Silly Piece. 3 stars
1/10/03 Jiz The story was a snoozer but the action scenes were the most hillariously bogus shit ever! 1 stars
1/08/03 qemm Jeez... it takes a genius to produce such crap 1 stars
11/14/02 Jenny Tullwartz Pretty dumb action; heroes and villains seem indistinguishable most of way through. 2 stars
10/07/02 Yo Mama! Hey...it wasn't that bad....it was shiny and fun, Lucy Lui was hot....by no means memorable 3 stars
10/02/02 Mister Char it was a new type of awful. definately a first. 1 stars
9/28/02 Uncle Salty Should have been called Ballistic: Total Garbage vs. 8 Dollars 1 stars
9/27/02 strider3700 think bad summer action movie that they pushed back abit 3 stars
9/27/02 MLBCHAN total crap, saw it free and was jipped 1 stars
9/26/02 lordcrunchyfrog Ballistink 2 stars
9/23/02 Buddha Totally crap. Cliche city. 1 stars
9/23/02 Yakobusan it was a super nice sweet action ride! 5 stars
9/21/02 MyztiQ i liked it just for the martial arts scenes. just kinda fun 3 stars
9/21/02 Jon Action scenes can actually be boring, this movie proves it. 2 stars
9/21/02 malcolm hong kong style fun 3 stars
9/21/02 Brian I saw it for free and still feel ripped off... 1 stars
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  20-Sep-2002 (PG-13)



Directed by
  Wych Kaosayananda

Written by
  Alan McElroy

  Antonio Banderas
  Lucy Liu
  Ray Park
  Miguel Sandoval
  Terry Chen
  Aidan Drummond

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