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Overall Rating
3.48

Awesome34.09%
Worth A Look: 29.55%
Just Average: 9.09%
Pretty Crappy: 4.55%
Sucks: 22.73%

2 reviews, 32 user ratings


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Michael Collins
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by MP Bartley

"The rape of history continues"
1 stars

I'm almost unable to describe how furious I was after seeing this movie. To think people who apparently have brains were given the money to vomit forth this offensive, vile piece of shit and THEN to try and pass it off as history. Goddamnit someone's got to make a stand against this, even if it's just me.

'Michael Collins' tries to convince us that it's telling the true story the Irish Republican leader in the 1920's and how he was treated by the British Government. It has the potential for a powerful, harrowing story. A shame then that it has all the accuracy of an American bomber in Afghanistan.


I want to clear one thing up. I'm not someone who whines about the English being made to be the villains in practically every Hollywood historical. The British Empire was much like any other Empire, cruel and corrupt to lesser nations. Read up on Gandhi for proof of that. But what I detest is fabrication merely to serve a story. It was the British Navy not the US, that captured the Enigma device in 'U-571' (in actual fact the U-571 was never captured). And every single Irish terrorist is not a freedom fighter. Not a misty-eyed romantic fighting to avenge their father's death like 'Patriot Games' or 'The Devils Own' would like to suggest. In fact Irish terrorists from the IRA or Sinn Fein are about as romantic as the average member of the Al-Quaeda.

It absolutely sickens me when Hollywood, which loves to dream the romantic notion that every American has a family link to Ireland somehow and that it's their true 'spiritual' homeland, continuely portrays Irish terrorists as decent men forced to fight against an oppressive government. Reality check Hollywood: The Irish aren't repressed in this way at all. Are there injustices? Plenty. False imprisonments, trial without juries, the list could go on. Just like Guantameno Bay, but I fail to see a director or a thousand Americans squealing about their 'struggle'. The vast majority of Irish are free to go where they want, when they want and practice what they want. I have family in Ireland, I know of what I speak. How do you think the average American would react if a film came out portraying the Taliban as a misunderstood minority crushed underneath the yoke of the Mighty West? It's the exact same thing.
I've been in Irish bars in America that serve a cocktail called an 'Irish Carbomb'. Lovely. How would they like one called 'The Twin Towers'? It's the same scumbag principle.

The problems in Ireland date back years ago, which is where a film like 'Michael Collins' should come in. It should report the facts as they happened and put the truth out on screen, not simply inflame matters for dramatic license.

Case in point 1: There's a scene where the nasty British government torture a poor ickle informer to death. Nasty isn't it? Makes you shocked at the brutality of the British doesn't it? Shame that the informer actually died peacefully 50 years later really. But hey who cares, we've got terrorists to promote here!

Case in point 2: The shocking mass murder of crowds at a football game. Shocking. Harrowing. Didn't happen like that. No more than a dozen (if that) died. And no, that doesn't make it better or ok, but how about all sides admit to the truth?

Case in point 3: Car bombs explode all over the movie. Hmm, shocking in a brutal way and shocking in a decades-before-they-were-actually-invented kind of way.

Case in point 4: Collins is seen as an idealistic freedom fighter (well he would be. All terrorists are 'idealistic') while the soon to be Irish Prime Minister Eamon De Valera is reduced to a rent-a-villain that wouldn't be seen out of place in a Bond movie. The movie then shows De Valera arranging Collins' death. Scary. Gut-wrenching. Horse shit. ABSOLUTE FICTION.

But no, there's no room for facts. It's symptomatic of Hollywoods obsession with portraying Irish terrorists as being forced into violence through the murder of a loved one by the cruel English. Not that the terrorists are merely bloodthirsty zealots, oh no there's always a back story where their father/mother/son/local milkman was murdered by the British army. What about the men, women and children murdered by IRA bombs? Don't they get a chance to tell their story? Get their revenge? Only if you're an Irish terrorist apparently.


It's not like 'Braveheart' where yes, the English are portrayed as heartless brutes, but the problem of Scottish independence is OVER. Ireland isn't. The problems persist to this day, with both the English and Irish Governments needing to own up to mistakes they've made.

It's a precarious, fragile situation that could easily escalate into bloody war again. And as long as shit-stirring, chunks of excretion like 'Michael Collins' continue to idioticly portray the Irish troubles as harmless downtrodden folk, rising up against their oppressors, then the situation won't go anywhere. The English are far, far from innocent...but then so are the Irish terrorists.

I've not mentioned one actor or the director during this review and I'm not going to. They don't deserve the notice. Every one of them should be thoroughly ashamed for signing on for this travesty. Especially those that are actually Irish.

Every copy of this should be found, spat upon and burned.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=627&reviewer=293
originally posted: 07/09/02 10:28:18
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User Comments

9/09/16 Anne Watched it for about an hour and gave up on it 2 stars
4/21/15 action movie fan good action, period peice-good movie,but niel jordan,s direction and editing are sloppy 3 stars
3/16/10 PAUL SHORTT EFFECTIVE, DRAMATIC, VIOLENT POLITICAL DRAMA WITH A GOOD STAR PERFORMANCE 3 stars
7/21/08 James Langton Film was excellent, tho sometime inaccurate. But the Documentry with it was my favourite 5 stars
4/03/08 Kelsey Not so bad that it deserves such foul and uneducated-sounding language, but fair enough. 4 stars
10/24/07 William Goss Makes for a better entertainment than a history lesson; episodic but effective enough. 4 stars
5/14/07 Nicky Gallagher Not keen on innacuracies about the IRA, MP Bartley? Burn and spit on every British tabloid. 5 stars
11/24/06 Rory amazing film made me cry 5 stars
2/14/06 Kenneth Munson Romanticiznig the 20s IRA is profoundly differentfrom the IRA today. Huge difference, sir. 4 stars
2/14/06 jakko o my god wat is this person on?? gr8 movie!!! 4 stars
10/18/05 Joseph O'Neill Collins didn't target civilians unlike the British 5 stars
9/15/05 gerard o'dwyer i want to be the next michale cllions 1 stars
11/20/04 Daveman Awe, those murdering IRA terrorists really were swell guys. 1 stars
9/22/04 Breslin Bloody Sunday (absurd soccer massacre) happened. Fact. 5 stars
8/03/04 Andrew so wat if its not exactly right. u dumbasses just dont understand wat was happening 5 stars
7/12/04 pilib de roiste true to history about the savage sadistic manical british 5 stars
7/10/04 x Very powerful. 5 stars
5/29/04 Butt Kicker I drop my pants & display my naked buttocks at MP Bartley's general direction 5 stars
5/27/04 Marcus MP Bailey - The rape of good movies continues 5 stars
3/07/04 R.W. Welch Not bad except for absurd soccer massacre which undercuts the pic's credibility. 3 stars
2/28/04 john just kind of floats along in a boring and uninvolving way 2 stars
4/01/03 X Powerful stuff. 5 stars
12/31/02 Britishlover I only rented it for the presence of Alan Rickman. Other than that, totally forgettable. 3 stars
11/11/02 Pam Sheppard the Irish weren't oppressed? it's called Penal Law.. Home Rules Bills, etc.get your facts 4 stars
10/25/02 Joe from USA and Irish blood Looks like more people liked this movie,MP Bartley, and ,IT IS ONLY A MOVIE.Fuckstain 5 stars
9/28/02 Peter Sherlock Dreadful 1 stars
9/23/02 michael byrne no doubt you have some english blood in you, however if you new the real history u wood cry 5 stars
8/30/02 I Burch Brilliant movie - and MP Bartley obviously knows fuck all about either Collins or this era. 5 stars
7/20/01 Dom Corleone Interesting film which ultimately connects with the viewer 4 stars
2/21/01 Steve in Prague damn you Irish idiots LET IT GO already 1 stars
11/30/98 Mr.Pink Intriguing film with an A for effort for everyone involved 5 stars
10/05/98 Tommy Maguire fascinating insight into a man who changed the course of Irish politics forever. A must see 4 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  05-Sep-1996 (R)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  N/A


Directed by
  Neil Jordan

Written by
  Neil Jordan

Cast
  Ian Hart
  Julia Roberts
  Richard Ingram
  Liam Neeson
  Aidan Quinn
  John Kenny



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