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Overall Rating

Awesome: 10.53%
Worth A Look: 5.26%
Just Average: 21.05%
Pretty Crappy: 2.63%

2 reviews, 26 user ratings

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Specialist, The
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by Slyder

"As explosive as a ruptured hernia"
1 stars

There was a one period of time in which I thought that I was missing some “great movies” that were showing on the theater like Last Action Hero, Independence Day, Twister and this film. I thought it was great even though I didn’t see it because of the vid-caps that I saw outside the movie theater. In the years that came, I finally managed to see those films and ended up wishing that I didn’t. This one was the worst of them all because I saw the others and at first I liked them, only to hate them in the end when I realized how god-awful they were. This one I hated it already halfway through the film. You know a movie is gonna suck when you start rooting for the villain rather than the hero.

Ray Quick (Sylvester Stallone) is the “specialist” of the film, a bomb expert working for the CIA (as usual), or as his then-partner Ned Trenton (James Woods) likes to refer to him as the “rigger” while Ned is the “trigger.” They both fall out after Ray tries to stop Ned from blowing up a car in which a Colombian terrorist/drug dealer was riding as well as a little, innocent and sweet kid. Ever heard that one before? Jeez, like a million fucking times. I don’t know why the fuck is it that they always have to recur to some of the most absurd clichés ever; and to top it off, Ray has a chance to kill Ned but doesn’t do it, simply because if he did, there wouldn’t be no reason for this shitbag to go on, but he didn’t kill him so let’s move on.

After this, Ray goes underground as a hitman, while Ned also goes as gun for hire for the Leon family, whom are Miami mob kingpins. In the picture comes May Munro (Sharon Stone), a vengeful gal who wants to see members of the Leon family dead, amongst them, Joe Leon (Rod Steiger) and his son Tomas (Eric Roberts) since he saw them (sans Joe) kill his family. Ever hear that one before too? If I were to summarize this film in one word, it would be cliché, because EVERYTHING, I mean everything that happens here is so predictable, which in the end makes for some shit-ass boring viewing. Also, if May saw Tomas do her family when she was a brat, why is it that Tomas hasn’t aged shit, and still remains the same despite like 20 or 30 fucking years past? Good lord, I just laughed when I saw this.

Since there’s practically no plot and it's full of holes the size of the ones that Ray’s explosives leave, the only thing that this film concentrates is on things that blow up. Everything here gets blown up, and the buildup that leads to these scenes is non-existent since you know what the fuck is going to happen, like the scene where one of the goons is killed when pressing some code at the exit of the parking lot, or the hotel blowup scene, and the crab-house and final explosion scenes which are the lamest of the explosive scenes. Another bad thing is that seeing a film with all explosions and pretty much no gunfire ended up annoying the shit out of me. AND RAY EVEN CALLED HIS CAT “TIMER.”

And don’t get me started with the chemistry between Stallone and Stone, there’s none whatsoever. In fact, they’re laughable and the sex scene, while nice to look at is boring and laughable, and also pretty lame. Stallone is bullshit here, and drones around the film like a walking piece of lead. Stone is hot, yes, but not even her breasts can save her ridiculous acting. Rod Steiger gives out one of the worst performances in his otherwise brilliant career, while Eric Roberts is just as bad as Stallone, that one fails to understand why he bitchs a lot about her sister Julia’s success? James Woods is the best of the bunch and steals every scene he’s in. In fact, in a film in which all the characters are assholes, he’s so awesome that you just want him to kill Ray and May for fucks sake, and of course, he has to die in the most stupid of circumstances. I guess it’s better to be a rigger rather than just a trigger.

In the end, this film at its best can pass as watchable trash; at its worst, it’s a boring pile of garbage waiting for the flies to buzz around. Sly, get the fuck back to acting school for fuck’s sake; Sharon, enough with the breasts, show us some acting for shit’s sake; James, fire your agent, NOW! Director Luis Llosa, and screenwriter Alexandra Seros, may you burn in hell for wasting 2 hours of my life. Good lord, next time I’ll research my choices better rather than just going for the flash in the pan. 0.5-5

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=773&reviewer=235
originally posted: 04/24/04 21:53:06
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User Comments

2/12/15 Me Sharon stone smoking cigarettes...it's worth watching for that alone 4 stars
8/28/09 Jeff Wilder Entertaining but not intellectualy stimulating. 3 stars
7/12/07 #1 Fan! I LOVE THIS MOVIE!!!!! 5 stars
1/25/06 JM Synth Not great, but not boring 3 stars
9/05/05 Luis A. Arroyo I think that some people talk a lot of shit; that movie mas GREAT! 5 stars
7/28/05 tony ok i guess 2 stars
6/02/05 Indrid Cold Trashy exploitation, but some good-looking and exciting action. 3 stars
4/02/04 Chirag Very Excllent Nice Sharon Ass and Tight Tits 5 stars
11/29/03 john clumsy boring and pointless 1 stars
3/21/03 Jack Sommersby Atrociously scripted yet directed with flair. Woods makes for dynamic villain. 3 stars
1/06/03 R.W. Welch Far-fetched, mildly entertaing explosion fest. Would have helped if it made sense. 3 stars
2/06/02 Zargo It's bad... but, it's good 5 stars
2/02/02 Erikoll Laughably bad, one of the worst I have ever seen. 1 stars
9/02/01 Butterbean Not that bad....not that good. 3 stars
4/24/01 Spetters It´s stupid, lame, bad, almost offensive nonsense. And i laughed all the way!!! 3 stars
8/22/00 zall No wonder Arnie is more popular than Sly 1 stars
11/22/99 strike I enjoyde it in a ´so bad it´s good´kind of way. 3 stars
9/22/99 Matt Sharon Stone naked.... What a suprise! Same as Quick & the Dead but with dynamite!!! DUMB! 1 stars
7/15/99 ObiWan Would rather bang my head in the wall and see this rock-bottom excuse for a movie. 1 stars
11/22/98 Peter OK, not his best movie. But the action is ok. 4 stars
11/12/98 Bad Kosh This sucked more ass, only when they treated us like idiotic bastards. Sigh... 1 stars
10/29/98 Negative Creep The worst film I have ever seen in a theatre. Its pure pain.And it was filmed in myhometown 1 stars
10/23/98 Kwyjibo You could have seen me throw up if you were at the cinema when I saw this. 1 stars
9/06/98 Young Einstein What total shit. Sly looks like a thalydamide kid. 1 stars
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  07-Oct-1994 (R)


  02-Nov-1994 (M)

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