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Overall Rating
2.67

Awesome: 9.76%
Worth A Look: 25%
Just Average: 18.29%
Pretty Crappy: 16.46%
Sucks30.49%

10 reviews, 104 user ratings


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End of Days
[AllPosters.com] Buy posters from this movie
by Erik Childress

"Arnold vs. Satan? Winner - Not the Audience"
2 stars

End of Days (* ½) – Time is running out. The year 2000 approaches and 1999 still has yet to produce a single scary Millennium movie. I didn’t know what to expect when I heard the original concept of this movie, which was “Arnold vs. Satan.” I suppose in the never-ending action genre, Satan would be an original villain. Movie heroes have fought off many minions of the Prince of Darkness, but never quite Michael Bay, I mean the Devil himself (unless you count the green liquid of a certain John Carpenter film). Nevertheless, I was still hoping for another fun time at the movies this year, a la Lake Placid, The Mummy or Deep Blue Sea, but consistency got the better of me. That’s right – consistency – and we’re talking about someone who owns Commando on laserdisc.

It’s obvious not a whole lot of originality (or thought) went into the script. Arnold’s first scene can be summed up in two words – Lethal Weapon. Arnold’s character also comes equipped with a drinking problem and a slain wife – Martin Riggs-style. And besides Gabriel Byrne and Kevin Pollak being in the same movie again – I counted at least two direct rip-offs from The Usual Suspects. Byrne pisses (black) all over a staircase and then drops a cigarette in slow motion to ignite it. It was like watching the frame-by-frame remake of Psycho for God’s sake. If that wasn’t enough, less than 10 minutes later, a character gets to utter the line – “the greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he doesn’t exist”. Bad movies and good movies rip-off or homage, respectively other ideas or moments from other films all the time – but the screenwriter of End of Days could have at least put a little spin on it. Byrne, in fact, gets to walk through this film as if he’s upset that he didn’t get to be Keyser Soze in that film. But, back to consistency. The rules of Satan’s new body bothered me. The spirit of Satan enters the body of investment banker Gabriel Byrne as a host. Satan is able to use this body on several occasions to walk through walls of fire unscathed. When Arnold pumps two slugs into him, Satan shows him how his wounds heal just like the T-1000. Wow – how can he be defeated? Why, machine-guns, of course. Heavy artillery. It’s not until Arnold shifts into Commando mode that he’s able to permanently scar Satan’s host body beyond repair. Now as high-concept or ridiculous the premise of Arnold vs. Satan may be – I’m willing to accept it. I may not like the rocket launcher approach to battling Satan as much as I did the final war of words between Keanu Reeves and Al Pacino in The Devil's Advocate (a Satan movie with ideas and thought, arguably the best Satan film ever) – but I can deal with it on a level of Arnold killing everyone, but let’s at least half some consistency. Robin Tunney has the unfortunate task of handling what is, perhaps, the most underwritten role of the year. If ever a woman were treated as just a body in an action film, it would be her. She becomes a part of some of the most gratuitous nudity of the year, which includes a menage-a-trois which was more effective in another Satan film. There were some quality kills in the movie, which I appreciated. But if we’re gonna get a surprise where Gabriel Byrne punches his way through a human skull without warning – why doesn’t he do that with every punch? A band of Church warriors is slaughtered within its walls, yet Rod Steiger is merely left unconscious. Again, consistency. My favorite moments, besides the quality kills involved Arnold’s sense of humor and good comic timing. I laughed incredibly hard when he questions that the devil’s time scheme involves Eastern time. That was brilliant and a little more of that type of self-aware humor conflicting with the already out-there premise would have been welcome.

There was a time, not long ago, when Arnold was choosing some really good scripts and not just his Ivan Reitman comedy trilogy, which I think are all terrific. He was making one good action film after another. Remember the days of Total Recall, Terminator 2, True Lies, and yes, even Last Action Hero, before the days of Eraser, Batman and Robin, and now End of Days. Maybe it’s time for Arnold to do another comedy.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=798&reviewer=198
originally posted: 02/14/00 21:19:20
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User Comments

10/30/16 morris campbell it rips of the exorcist & and rosemarys baby good effects though still it sux 1 stars
7/28/14 The Hammer Schwarzenegger crucified! Satan fuses a mother & daughter during an orgy! Devilishly Good 4 stars
3/13/10 PAUL SHORTT NASTY AND OVER-THE-TOP 1 stars
8/29/09 the dork knight The Devil Pees gasoline? 4 stars
8/12/08 Shaun Wallner Great Action!! 5 stars
8/09/08 Bnorm I wouldnt have elected him after seeing this turd thats for sure 1 stars
10/23/07 Ivana Mann The best of the worst laugh-till-you-pee millenium "thrillers." 1 stars
4/23/07 Indrid Cold Byrne never actually does anything cool. Contrast with Al Pacino in Devil's Advocate. 2 stars
1/15/07 David Pollastrini saw it but have no memory so it must have sucked 3 stars
2/19/06 Ronin Horrible script from the purely logical point of view. Arnold OK, Robin Tunney v. cute. 2 stars
10/29/05 chris good film i enjoyed it fully 5 stars
2/10/05 Jeff Anderson All I could possibly say is, I liked it a lot better than STIGMATA & LOST SOULS! FUN!!!!!!! 4 stars
4/28/04 X Just terrible 1 stars
3/16/04 Brando FAH! 1 stars
2/09/04 Whatevr This movie caused my eyes to bleed 1 stars
11/29/03 john end of arnold 1 stars
9/09/03 Dreafre As a friday night TV diversion it has its moments 4 stars
3/03/03 Jack Sommersby Uneven and silly, but also very entertaining. A guilty pleasure. 4 stars
1/13/03 CAPTAIN FOX GREAT FILM OVERALL ARNOULDS BEST EVER 5 stars
10/26/02 MarktheShark6 Hey, at least the soundtrack was decent, right? 1 stars
7/11/02 KMG When they say end of days they really mean end of good movies 3 stars
4/05/02 Junshi Um...I'm not sure I remember anything but errm...the plot is utterly worthless. 1 stars
3/29/02 Evan The Critic I'll go to church when I want to learn about the bible. Go rent Total Recall instead 2 stars
3/01/02 Alan Smithee Nothing but a complete pile of shit. 1 stars
1/14/02 Magnum Craphole The most embarassing thing Arnold ever did. Pure garbage. 1 stars
12/14/01 Cracked head One of the stupidest movies ever made. 1 stars
11/29/01 The $1.98 Pyramid Poor Byrne. What a fallout since "The Usual Suspects." 2 stars
11/24/01 Cookie Cutter An insult. 1 stars
8/07/01 Mr. Hat Not asgoodas I expected,but scary if U see it when 1st released.Past y2k,no scare no flare. 2 stars
8/05/01 badfish First i love Arnie.That said this was a big piece of stinky Yak dung! 1 stars
7/14/01 officer 412/l arnie you've past it. you are to old to be doing action movies and you cant act. 1 stars
7/08/01 Gracy Lionheart Pure Arnie Junk. I love action films, but this blew big time. 1 stars
6/11/01 Crisis Management This movie sucks, and Chef ADogg proves again he's a total idiot with no clue whatsoever. 1 stars
5/01/01 TNT-6 "This movie is shit" and laughing their ass off. That's how everybody was in the theater. 1 stars
4/23/01 Luke Arnie Arnie Arnie! 4 stars
4/04/01 hum wow this is dumb! Did the writters do ANY research? 1 stars
3/24/01 Monster W. Kung Arnie, what the hell happened to you... this one BLOWS DONKEYS! 1 stars
1/25/01 Diego Romero It´s just pure Arnie action 4 stars
1/16/01 The Terminator Probalbly Schwarenegger's most underrated movie 4 stars
1/14/01 Action freak Dark thriller, I liked it 4 stars
1/10/01 Jason Rowlands End of Days rocks! It shows that even the Devil can be outwitted. 5 stars
12/31/00 R.W. Welch Pretty well done villain, otherwise not much. 2 stars
12/24/00 bub you are all going to hell for comments like that!!!!!!!! 5 stars
10/26/00 JC23 I really enjoyed this movie 4 stars
9/26/00 Terrie Smith Arnie's done better but the film has its moments; good visual effects. 4 stars
6/21/00 Visc I don't care what other people say, this is a good movie. 4 stars
6/03/00 OS Oh come on, this movie isn't that bad 4 stars
6/01/00 Wafer too many gratuitous Arnold grunts and irrelevant alcoholism references 1 stars
6/01/00 Jimmy Could have ben better, but it was still pretty good. 4 stars
5/22/00 Monday Morning $50 mil for EFX, not a farthing for original thinking. 2 stars
5/20/00 mellemel Bad. Really Bad. 1 stars
5/18/00 Steve A great performance by Byrne, an entertaining flick 4 stars
5/14/00 Chrissy T Why does Gabriel never live to see daylight.He's the Devil.Let the man get some for once. 2 stars
5/02/00 matt entertaining movie, but not awesome, however extremely entertaining 4 stars
4/26/00 Leo Chef ADogg is right this is by no means a great movie but an entertaining one 4 stars
4/22/00 The Bomb 69 surprisingly enjoyable 4 stars
4/18/00 foxgroundcolt "easy with the hardware!!!" 4 stars
4/09/00 Bruce Not one of Arnold's great movies, but it was decent 4 stars
3/14/00 Lame-Oh GO SEE THE NINTH GATE 1 stars
3/09/00 movieman has it's highs and lows, but overall it was entertaining 4 stars
3/05/00 Captain Highcrime Hilarious to hear Arnie butcher the phrase "Glock Nine Millimeter." 3 stars
2/11/00 James Woodman Good solid return for arnie 4 stars
2/08/00 Ed Wood very enjoyable 5 stars
1/19/00 k.tomkowski Poor script. Arnie proves he cannot act. Byrnes is very good. 3 stars
1/17/00 Dirk Diggler i enjoyed it 5 stars
1/14/00 Marli I can't say anything about this movie 3 stars
1/13/00 henry hill I enjoyed this film 5 stars
1/12/00 heroinchic Come on Arnie! Back to basics. Stop playing the Goodies. Your boring unless bad 2 stars
1/12/00 master this is a good film 5 stars
1/11/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/11/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/11/00 dr.d i liked it 5 stars
1/11/00 dr.d underated 5 stars
1/09/00 Aiken Drum Its Arnie saving the world, what a guy. 3 stars
1/05/00 Joel Harwood Freaky 5 stars
1/05/00 Ian Rivlin Pathetic claptrap 1 stars
12/24/99 Stu Shoot me, shoot me now, please. 2 stars
12/23/99 Wafer I've never seen a worse movie & every fight scene was filled w/ excessive schwarzen-grunts 1 stars
12/22/99 Matrinka Oh god... I'd rather let Satan win than watch this movie again. 1 stars
12/19/99 Mr Showbiz Simply put... shite. 1 stars
12/16/99 Lame-Oh this was campier and stupider than the ad. Lies, lies, LIES! 1 stars
12/11/99 Obi Wan The Devil is the shit, Gabriel Rocked it!! Bruce Willis should have played Jericho 3 stars
12/09/99 Sher worst movie in the world..priests are so pathetic that they allowed Arnold to fight satan.. 1 stars
12/07/99 JonnyAngel Even after all the bad reviews, I relly thought I'd like it, but... 2 stars
12/07/99 majawat um, not good. Not good at all. But not painful at least. 2 stars
12/07/99 Cheryl Man, people TOLD me not to see this piece of shit and I didn't listen... 1 stars
12/05/99 Ami the wonderbread I just don't buy Jericho's "strength" at the end to defeat Satan. Whatever. 1 stars
12/05/99 Amy Lamest script I've ever heard, but Gabriel Byrne was good. At least it wasn't boring. 3 stars
12/05/99 Wojtek Arciszewski Reminded me of British cooking... some interesting moments... but over all a bland meal 2 stars
12/03/99 joe chip Its amazing what you'll agree to when you're on fire 2 stars
12/03/99 russ johnson THIS MOVIE SUCKED MAJOR ASS.....ARNOLD IT IS TIME TO RETIRE 1 stars
12/02/99 Kevin Way Cheesy. Boring. If you must see it, catch it on cable in about... two weeks. 1 stars
12/02/99 Carlos G. Lamas A Terrible Waste of Film and Time 1 stars
12/02/99 Roman A damn fun time 5 stars
11/30/99 Vaughn Allen Let's not get hung up on being cynical- this movie was fun as hell 5 stars
11/30/99 MickCollins The biggest piece of shit since "Spawn" 1 stars
11/30/99 Ryan Phillipe got hit by a car and it rules This movie was so brilliant. It truly moved me in ways a movie has never moved me before. 1 stars
11/28/99 George Nedelchev Good one-liners are not enough. Disappointing comeback for Arnie. 2 stars
11/28/99 Chet Patel this was one huge P.O.S. Arnie has gotten very desperate for a film. 1 stars
11/26/99 The King of the Bros I just liked it when that old lady kicked Arnold's ass. 3 stars
11/25/99 CATM The ending gave it a higher rating, but could've been better.Too gorey 3 stars
11/25/99 Lame-Oh could have been better 3 stars
11/24/99 Thomas Aquinas...man, that wasn't even original in the movie... Byrne was fun to watch, & Arnold's old reliable, but there's an excess of jokeyness 4 stars
11/23/99 Ramsay With less action and a real actor, it might have been interesting 3 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  24-Nov-1999 (R)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  26-Dec-1999




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