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Overall Rating

Awesome: 23.48%
Worth A Look: 6.96%
Just Average: 6.52%
Pretty Crappy: 2.61%

8 reviews, 182 user ratings

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Bad Boys 2
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by Rob Gonsalves

"Altman is dead, and Michael Bay is still alive?"
1 stars

I don't know quite when I realized it -- possibly it was when Will Smith had his arm inside a corpse's belly up to the elbow -- but 'Bad Boys II' is Hollywood psychopathology writ large, almost demoniacal in its quest to outdo itself and destroy the audience.

This isn't a daffy thrill ride like Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle -- it's more like a gut-heaving rollercoaster that won't stop until it rattles your teeth out. Yet I had a hard time staying awake through it (and it was an early-afternoon show). For all its explosive, expensive bluster, it's no better than any ten cops-vs.-drug-runners flicks of the '80s, and there isn't a moment that isn't utterly synthetic.

Perhaps that's to be expected from producer Jerry Bruckheimer and director Michael Bay, past perpetrators of The Rock, Armageddon, Pearl Harbor, and the original Bad Boys, which gave us Martin Lawrence and Will Smith as renegade cops. After eight years -- during which time the world got along just fine without the further adventures of Marcus Burnett (Lawrence) and Mike Lowrey (Smith) -- they're back to squash an evil druglord (Jordi Molla) who's looking to push Ecstasy in the nightclubs of Miami. Mike is trying to figure out how to tell Marcus that he's going out with Marcus' sister (Gabrielle Union), who's also an undercover cop. For his part, Marcus is waiting for the right time to tell the cocky, foolhardy Mike that he wants a less risky partner. Less a few bombastic sequences, that's the movie.

Bad Boys II shoots its works rather early, with the aggressive freeway car chase (which leaves the road littered with wrecked autos and, at one point, a boat) you might've caught in the trailer. This is the sort of movie in which a cop drives an ambulance into a mortuary just to provide a distraction for the "heroes" (what would the characters in a lesser-budget movie do? Probably fall back on their imaginations). There are shootouts galore, including one in which we see a bullet pass in loving slow motion through Martin Lawrence's left buttock and slam bloodily into a Ku Klux Klansman's throat. Everything is way over the top, but since Michael Bay has none of the wit of, say, James Cameron (who knows how to stage excessive chaos with rhythm and force), it just numbs you after about an hour.

When we're not watching action blowouts, we're supposed to laugh at the film's generous helping of sick humor. For this I assume the credited screenwriters Ron Shelton (Dark Blue) and Jerry Stahl (Permanent Midnight) were responsible, though it comes off as smart writers trying to stave off boredom. Smith and Lawrence gang up on a hapless kid who shows up to take Lawrence's daughter on a date; they pelt him mercilessly with taunts and intimidation, but the actor playing the kid hardly even reacts, so there's no fun in watching the guys scare an inexpressive lump.

And the film really has it in for dead bodies (a hiding place for drugs); many of them are run over in yet another car chase, the top of a cadaver's skull falls off in a mortuary, and Lawrence is stuck hiding under a sheet with a well-endowed female corpse. There's also a fair amount of horsing around with someone's severed finger.

When Joseph Wambaugh's novel 'The Choirboys' came out almost thirty years ago, it created a stir because of the sordid exploits of its cop characters. Wambaugh's cops have nothing on the adventures of Smith and Lawrence, and they're supposed to be the heroes.

link directly to this review at http://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=7988&reviewer=416
originally posted: 01/01/07 13:57:58
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User Comments

5/03/18 Chuck I see hypocritical liberals doing what they do best, whining about this fun film. 5 stars
9/13/17 morris campbell good action thats about it 1 stars
5/29/15 Mr. Brown Nasty, mean-spirited, grossly misogynistic and, above all - boring. 1 stars
2/22/13 austin a monstrosity 1 stars
10/24/10 Frank Fontaine It's good for what it is, which is generic by-the-numbers action. 1 stars
8/02/10 Daniel This movie is the best movie i have ever seen so u all shut the fuck up 5 stars
6/23/10 sanchez awsome movie worth watching 5 stars
9/12/09 Sugarfoot It really is as awful as the reviews would indicate. 1 stars
8/09/09 Gristofer I like Badboys but when i saw the second film.Omg the second one is horrible. 2 stars
6/08/09 freak i hated it 1 stars
7/29/08 the dork knight It took two hours for the bad guy to get shot in slow-motion and die. 3 stars
7/12/08 Keefe A shocking exposition of the rationale behind this cognitively deficient anti-talent 1 stars
5/12/08 Dean This movie is cool. I give it 6.5 out of ten. 3 stars
2/07/08 Anthony Feor doesn't work if tRecycled formula he first film was mediocre too. Bay's worst film. 1 stars
1/25/08 man horrible 1 stars
1/21/08 Dr. Zoidberg Bay is the scum of Hollywood. Period. 1 stars
12/05/07 Pamela White not much better than the first but action scenes are good 3 stars
11/22/07 Quality Mean-spirited and brain-dead in the extreme 1 stars
9/01/07 Tim worst pile of shit, ever 1 stars
6/24/07 Sam Probably the worst film I have ever seen. 1 stars
6/18/07 al smith excellent funny and great action sequences 5 stars
5/12/07 kate hot movie, love Will Smith andit was pretty funny. 4 stars
4/18/07 Stevo UK big dumb action movie that fails regularly, but shouldnt be too off putting for fans. 3 stars
2/20/07 Johnno Michael Bay, do the world a favor and kill yourself!!! 1 stars
1/05/07 jerg Re:Frustrated, your society is already fucked, shit like this is why 1 stars
12/22/06 Warren Collin Souter is an idiot. Very entertaining movie. 5 stars
12/18/06 David Pollastrini HORRIBLE, ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE 1 stars
7/29/06 William Goss "That was reckless, that was stupid, and that was dangerous." Marginally entertaining, too. 3 stars
5/28/06 John 11/10 BEST MOVIE EVER 5 stars
5/22/06 Jack Sommersby Not all that bad but fatally overlong. 3 stars
5/15/06 steph madeley bluddy brilliant 5 stars
5/15/06 bmac this movie was hoooooottttttttttt so shutup 5 stars
2/06/06 Anthony This goes to show everyone how good sequels are 1 stars
1/12/06 Monster W. Kung A no-brain, moronic monstrosity. 1 stars
12/16/05 Sean D Michael Bay. Save The Planet & Just Fucking Kill Yourself. 1 stars
12/14/05 cooler garbage,garbage,garbage,please Bay kill yourself 1 stars
10/30/05 Dan amazing film shut the hell up you losers sayin its crap 5 stars
10/25/05 jake kutcher the best and the funniest movie ever 5 stars
9/18/05 Jonathon Holmes Micheal Bay's films are the root of all evil, I mean, how else can you explain Bush? 1 stars
9/02/05 tony What a rip off. I should have rented Speed 2. At least i would have enjoyed that. 1 stars
8/22/05 ES Good chemistry between Smith and Lawrence entertains, funny part and decent action 4 stars
7/20/05 Naruto one of the worst movies of all time. my dog does better shit 1 stars
7/12/05 okito the movie was really great but yeah fuckin long 4 stars
7/05/05 JimSmith A really disastrous movie 1 stars
6/29/05 Kankasaur The Bad Boys are in their terrible twos 1 stars
5/01/05 reuben rupp i hate anything with racist comics. and the movie just sucks all together. 1 stars
1/23/05 Jeff Anderson A TRULY RACIST, MORONIC, AND HATEFUL FILM! Ugly to look at and repulsive in the extreme. 1 stars
1/09/05 bana homophobic,sadistic,mysogynistic and cruel bullshit 1 stars
11/01/04 whane this film was the best i have ever seen i would keep watchin it as well 5 stars
10/23/04 ODH I cannot think of one good thing to say about this flick 1 stars
8/23/04 Naka Dear God, what a bad movie. Plot holes abound, and there's no plot. 1 stars
7/25/04 jazzmine debose It was entertaining. Not supposed to be oscar material. chill out you haters 4 stars
7/15/04 Boris Smith Well, at least there was a cool car chase 3 stars
7/14/04 Monster W. Kung Utter ass! 1 stars
6/14/04 Paul Carone Big pile of donkey raping sac of nonsense! 1 stars
5/21/04 Hal Galikakick Bad Boys for Life? I almost pissed myself 1 stars
5/19/04 Stephanie Vallejo It was great! Very funny and keeps you entertained. 5 stars
5/18/04 Dr. Lecter Fuck the sperm and egg that created Michael Bay 1 stars
5/17/04 matty it is the best movie 5 stars
5/12/04  Shaun Rose Great follow-up to the original. Non-stop action and some funny lines 5 stars
5/05/04 J.Peckerfoot What?ethnic cop stuff?hell, i like it. 5 stars
4/24/04 gromm Heh. Heh. Heheheheh. Heheh. Fire! Fire! Heheheheh. Fire's cool! Yah! Heheheheh. 1 stars
4/19/04 Zach Otto This movie is awesome it is sooo good. You people are retarded. 5 stars
4/11/04 Wildcarde1 just bad bad bad...bad 1 stars
3/30/04 Alex This is a fun movie. Will Smith and Martin Lawrence are hilarious. Great action as well. 4 stars
3/26/04 Christo Bay, You the man 5 stars
3/09/04 Bori sSmith Great beginning, lousy middle, great ending...All in all, bad comedy, good action 3 stars
3/03/04 john loud obnoxious and obvious - film making with no style substance or integrity! 1 stars
2/20/04 john entertaining. i especially loved jessica karr and her huge boobs. 4 stars
2/17/04 Kane Greatest Film to hit the Big Screen, Scott Weinberg u r a deadset wanker! 5 stars
2/17/04 Apathy Stupid, but entertaining. 4 stars
2/16/04 The Director You Fucking suck Total Crap people! 5 stars
2/14/04 Alfredo All involved need to have their testicles torn off by wild dogs. 1 stars
1/28/04 Alex Awesome 5 stars
1/28/04 J Lawrence and Smith are HILARIOUS and violent! 5 stars
1/21/04 Buck Offensively bad. One of the worst movies I've seen in years. 1 stars
1/15/04 John statman This movie was the bomb 5 stars
12/28/03 danny salzer I liked it alot better than the frist one! 5 stars
12/17/03 Brandi IT ROCKED!!! 5 stars
12/11/03 Igor Some great action scenes but Martin fucked it up. It's worth seeing at least once. 3 stars
12/08/03 Randy Muselman Why did they actually make this film? 1 stars
11/27/03 ROY L. CAIN,JR. ACTION! MAYHEM! VIOLENCE! The team of SMITH & LAWRENCE does it again !!! 5 stars
11/27/03 John unbelievably brainless, stupid and bad - gives action films a bad name 1 stars
11/13/03 Lord Chu Ass sucking. 1 stars
11/12/03 Wayne Smith I think it is a really good film and i want to watch it again 4 stars
10/17/03 Josh Standlee And the award for "Best Duo in a Movie for 2003" goes to: Will Smith and Martin Lawrence! 5 stars
10/15/03 Kate Sobon it's very good 5 stars
10/13/03 Steve You forgot to mention that it was a comedy, and a funny one too. 4 stars
10/12/03 AR The only good thing was the latin song (and latin ladies), when they were on the beach.. 2 stars
10/09/03 Erik Van Sant POOP ON SCREEN IS SILLY. 1 stars
10/06/03 Carlos Mojica Great movie, humor and action atop 5 stars
9/28/03 jimmy d a long thought out thriler with a brilliant twist at the end....oops no it isnt....... 1 stars
9/22/03 Zaharin Hamid aka The Movie Samseng Yes, some parts are really stupid. Nowhere as good as the first one but good enough. 3 stars
9/21/03 Frustrated If people actually enjoyed this movie, I fear for the wellbeing of our society 1 stars
9/19/03 whitney brown hella funny 5 stars
9/18/03 Shams Huque The highway chase was the only good thing... 2 stars
9/11/03 dam dam 5 stars
9/05/03 tim aweful 1 stars
8/29/03 amoviefan Don't look away, might miss something 5 stars
8/28/03 Double G sequals ruin the originals so much, i hate that!!! 1 stars
8/22/03 Collin Smith & Lawernce are tallentless assholes 1 stars
8/20/03 Tierra Reid Its funny as hell, its a good movie 5 stars
8/16/03 Big Nic Felt like the super man ride at six flags 5 stars
8/13/03 nfh BB2 fucked up movie 1 stars
8/13/03 J. R. Hammond Sucks. Horrible. A travesty. Awful. 1 stars
8/11/03 a.g. moore Good escapism and a waste of good cars! 5 stars
8/10/03 Raquel Hassan One of the best of Will and Lawrence 5 stars
8/08/03 Joe Bloggs Jessica Karr = nice tits.... 2 stars
8/07/03 Han terrible! awful! 1 stars
8/07/03 Bea the absolute worst excuse for a movie ever. 1 stars
8/07/03 Kirk Perry I think it was a good movie. 4 stars
8/07/03 Colin You Want Blood Guts And Gore See Freddy Vs Jason And Skip This Forgetable Joke Of A Movie 1 stars
8/06/03 Meh racism is so funny, 1 stars
8/06/03 Andrea ok, i dont know what u people were smoking on, but that was the best damn movie of the yr. 5 stars
8/05/03 jimmy**everyone shut up**bean this movie was awesome...the bitching of martin lawerence was the only downfall 5 stars
8/05/03 Travis Overall exciting/humourous film 4 stars
8/05/03 Mike worst movie of the year so far 1 stars
8/04/03 JK Film Not Bad, Critics on This Site Dopes 3 stars
8/03/03 Oskar dis movie was ridiculously(spelling) awesome i feel sorry for u ppl who thought it was bad 5 stars
8/03/03 Joman this shit sucks 1 stars
8/02/03 HH sucked bad 1 stars
8/02/03 andy funny movie i thought the jokes were funny expecially when martim laurence takes the extaci 5 stars
8/02/03 Dark Barøn The heros are more cruel than the villain. 1 stars
8/01/03 Will and Martin Suck! 1 stars
8/01/03 What?!! Cmon Guys! This movie was just plain awful! What kind of people are you to say it was good? 1 stars
7/30/03 Nicole Didn't see the first, so maybe I am missing something.....had its moments (very few!!) 2 stars
7/30/03 Steve this film was so awful 1 stars
7/29/03 Igor Not much acting or plot. But this is a very entertaining film with some awesome scenes. 5 stars
7/28/03 chris Best Flick of the Summer 5 stars
7/28/03 Collin This Makes The Friday The 13th Series Look Like Shakesphere 1 stars
7/28/03 janet i think it was a great movie. very entertaining 5 stars
7/28/03 Boomer Very entertaining, plenty of comedy, lots of thinks blowing up, car chase off the hook!!! 5 stars
7/28/03 Rob this film was awful, and mean 1 stars
7/27/03 Jason Raksnis Best damn Will Smith movie of all time, 2 thumbs up 5 stars
7/27/03 Renee GREAT MOVIE 5 stars
7/27/03 jason shatley And I guess you enjoyed "28 days later"? 4 stars
7/26/03 Steve I wouldn't watch it if they paid me for the ticket 1 stars
7/26/03 John Franson Afterwards is like being in septic shock. Wanted to rub out my eyes with a brillo pad. 1 stars
7/25/03 BB Sucked!!!! 1 stars
7/25/03 M.G I feel really sorry for those who think this movie was “the best summer action-comedy.” 1 stars
7/24/03 Jaws hated it...... 1 stars
7/24/03 dre I'm sorry I came off like a total dumbass in my previous post. 1 stars
7/23/03 Stephanie I liked the movie it was entertaining and i enjoyed it 5 stars
7/23/03 Jake it's pointless & stupid, slopily writen and over loaded with pointless gore 1 stars
7/23/03 Rachelle Will Smith is good but the movie sucks! 1 stars
7/23/03 dre movie friggin rocks. definately need a stupid un-realistic comedy every now and then 5 stars
7/22/03 John mean spirited movie that had me thinking about leaving 1 stars
7/22/03 Desperado I loved it, sure it was a little dumb and sick in parts, but it was a good movie 3out of4 4 stars
7/22/03 Courtney This movie is not just incredibly bad and unfunny, but it is also very, very boring 1 stars
7/22/03 Angelo Solis Worst Movie I've ever seen 1 stars
7/22/03 Cockerel Chorus Everybody involved in this film should be tortured to death 1 stars
7/22/03 Jay Man Wonderful, hilarious review. Keep up the good work. 1 stars
7/21/03 DC There isn't a word in English to describe the hate this movie welled up in me 1 stars
7/21/03 LoTech if our children are our future then we are now truly fucked if they like this movie 1 stars
7/21/03 Jackie Could see it over and over again ! 5 stars
7/21/03 B-MAN Exactly what I expected from a summer movie. Don't listen to the critics that bash it. 5 stars
7/21/03 pulpbomb Loved it! Pure popcorn! 4 stars
7/21/03 Dan Not the worst film ever made, but pretty horrible. Does not deserve the money it's made. 2 stars
7/21/03 Serge Rodnunsky I crapped my pants because I needed an excuse to leave the theater 1 stars
7/21/03 RMP It is the perfect summer movie 5 stars
7/21/03 dave an embarr-ass-ment of a movie 1 stars
7/21/03 LynCap Not better than the original!! Too long, and too reckless!!! 4 stars
7/21/03 malcolm rats do it missionary style? some good action but just too much of everything else 3 stars
7/20/03 Shawn fuckin awesome!!!!!!! 5 stars
7/20/03 Nikaelah Seen and heard it all before. 3 stars
7/20/03 Robert Anderson Great Movie I enjoyed the film very much 5 stars
7/20/03 Brian the end is really fucking nigh 1 stars
7/20/03 John40 The worst movie to be released in years. 1 stars
7/20/03 Jon Not as bad as most ppl say it is, but its nothing groundbreaking either. 3 stars
7/20/03 The Talking Elbow Ashley says "it was suspensful and TOUCHING" WTF?? Are you snorting glue woman. 1 stars
7/20/03 srburns Yep, racial jokes and homophobic humor *are* funny 4 stars
7/20/03 Earl Dittman - Wireless Magazine Here it is Space Monkeys! A Cinematic cure for constipation! 1 stars
7/20/03 Hate isn't strong enough ANYONE who gives this movie an Awesome rating has no soul 1 stars
7/20/03 David Cross I've taken shits that were more enjoyable than this movie. 1 stars
7/20/03 RenHoek It's official: Bay thinks the average moviegoer has the IQ of a lobotomised tapeworm 1 stars
7/19/03 jawsboy24 Mostly crap. Average acting and a convulted script. Great action, but annoying camera work. 3 stars
7/19/03 Shaun worst movie of the year. I have never felt so insulted by a film. 1 stars
7/18/03 BAD bad 1 stars
7/18/03 Jeff I like it. But everybody has their on voice to speak about it. 5 stars
7/18/03 dave Smith & Lawrence prove they're not big-flick stars 1 stars
7/18/03 Arnold Schwarzenegger This piece of shit won't be back. 1 stars
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  18-Jul-2003 (R)
  DVD: 07-Sep-2004



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