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SONIC DEATH MONKEY SOUNDTRACK REVIEWS - Lizzie Maguire Movie & the Chick Flix Compilation

Sonic Death Monkey is seen every Saturday
by Michael Collins

This week Sonic Death Monkey looks at that horrific beast that is the chick flick with the soundtracks to Lizzie Maguire and a compilation of movie hits called Chick Flix. Join me as I descend into girlie hell.

Chick Flix eh? Canít get laid with out Ďem - Canít ceremoniously burn the DVD.

Well maybe you can do the latter, but you gotta remember the risk that carries when trying to get the former.

The funny thing about the Chick Flix soundtrack is that it starts precisely how you think it wouldnít.

Of all things it starts with a 70s disco standard from Donna Summer. Then comes the equally up beat Grease melody and then itís more disco with Diana Ross. Nice and funky to be sure, but whereís the all important romance element that is central to the chick flick?

This album is slumber party music and the intention of the opening tracks is to get the Girls Style Party in top gear.

Contributing to this party atmosphere is Irene Caraís Flashdance. As is the case with pretty much any song from Grease these songs almost demand dances acting out the scenes and moods from the movies.

The surprises continue with not one, but two selections from the Pulp Fiction soundtrack.

Pulp Fiction? A Chick Flick? Is there some other movie called Pulp Fiction that I donít know about?

Well this CDís producers evidently think itĎs a Chick Flick. Maybe girls want to be Uma Thurman. I guess I can understand that.

So we have Dusty Springfieldís Son Of A Preacher Man and Urge Overkillís rendition of the old Sounds-A-Bit-Kiddie-Porn-To-Me Neil Diamond smash, Youíll Be A Woman Soon. Perhaps that song has some appeal to girls.

Then comes the very indie sounding Modern English with I Melt With You. Itís great little guitar strum along pop thatís very old school Ė very mid 80s. Even on the standards that this CD has set, itís an unusual choice, but I have to say itís a great track. The Cardigansí Lovefool is equally good pop.

More straight down the line great pop comes from Simple Minds with Donít You Forget About Me, Sixpence None The RicherĎs Kiss Me, Peter Gabriel with the rather left-of-field choice of I Grieve, Roy Orbison (gotta love that riff from Pretty Woman) and Lisa Loebís slightly over-angsty, Stay.

It is with Loebís track that this CDís mood starts to shift a little from a party album to soppy romantic vehicle that we all feared from the beginning. In a similar style is Lennoxís contribution of Why.

The romantic mood that will send all the guys screaming comes in the form of Ronan Keating with When You Say Nothing At All, Wet Wet Wetís Love Is All Around, Love Is Strange from Dirty Dancing (What about The Time Of My Life? SheĎs Like The Wind or Hungry Eyes?) and A Kiss To Buy A Dream on by jazz great Louis Armstrong.

The target audience for this CD comes through loud clear. Itís young teenage girls or at least females who want to recall those feelings. This albumís first half is surprisingly enjoyable. Buy it guys Ė It might get you laid.

So I survived The Chick Flix trial relative unscathed, so now letís see how I go with The Lizzie Maguire Movie Soundtrack - A soundtrack of a franchise that is even more strongly focused on the teen girl market.

Iíve been spared the Lizzie Maguire/Hilary Duff phenomena - It just hasnít hit my town. Lucky me methinks.

Despite the unusual choices of the Chick Flix compilation I was still expecting that this time I would get my girlie sugary pop. This time Iím on the money.

Duffís performance of Why Not is all grrrl empowerment, and itíd be all light and breezy acoustic-led pop if it wasnít so glossy in its (over) production.

Atomic Kitten make The Tide Is High sound like a kitten being tortured - well we should have expected that. And hey I donít hate it.

But I do hate the Cooler Kids with All Around The World. Itís techno pop at its worst. Even pre-schoolers would think itís contrived.

At least What Dream Are Made Are Made Of was less than two minutes long, but they manage to pack on the soppiness into that 100 seconds. It was enough to make me go to Suicidegirls.com to make me feel normal again.

Ok I admit that Jump 5ís Shining Star was seriously funky. You canít help to dance to this. Címon, put this track on - show us your moves. That one actually ends too soon. Man, I feel so dirty like it.

Oh dear - I came crashing back to earth with Vitamin C and Volare. It was quite a struggle to listen to the whole track. Oh man, how I suffer for you people.

The suffering continues with LMNT and this time I didnít make it through the whole track - Next!

Next are the Beu Sisters and the pop funk returns with You Make Me Feel Like A Star. This song bounces along, and continues a strong theme of girls can do anything in the universe that is Lizze Maguire.

Taylor Dayne contributes with Supermodel and I didnĎt last out this one

I donít care if Haylie Duff is the girl in the band. Pseudo Rock Band
shite - Get out!

Ah thatís better . . .

Dean Martin.

The martini soaked crooner rather inexplicably turns up with On An Evening In Roma. Itís in his signature part-Italian style and this fan right here is liking it.

The mood somewhat changes for an orchestral suite from film composer Cliff Eidelman. He provides a suite from the filmís real soundtrack. Itís orchestral and light. Lots of flutes and harps and other nice girlie things. Quite nice really. Especially the marimbas bit - if youíre hitting for downloads, get this one and keep you ear out for Eidelman.

Apart from a reprise of Why Not, the orchestral suite finishes the album on a nice note. Thank goodness. This one was a hard stretch, but it ended well.

Well I survived the girlie film onslaught. The Chick Flix had its surprises and at least The Lizze Maguire soundtrack was saved at the end thanks to the Eidelman composition.

Phew! I made it. Now Iím off to see House Of A 1000 Corpses.

link directly to this feature at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/feature.php?feature=815
originally posted: 10/11/03 03:52:11
last updated: 09/23/05 00:59:49
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