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Overall Rating

Awesome: 33.33%
Worth A Look: 3.7%
Just Average: 0%
Pretty Crappy: 3.7%

2 reviews, 15 user ratings

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Dangerous Men
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by Peter Sobczynski

"Some Things Are Better Off On the Shelf"
1 stars

With films like "Manos--The Hands of Fate" (which recently received a lavish Blu-Ray treatment that would the envy of most respectable films of its vintage that either get the bare-bones treatment or continue to languish in the vaults) and "The Room" (whose tumultuous creation is now being commemorated in a feature film starring James Franco) having their awfulness ironically embraced by hipsters around the world, cinema archivists are now working overtime to unearth long-forgotten duds. The latest oldie-but-not-so-goodie to get this treatment is "Dangerous Men," a micro-budgeted revenge opus in the mode of "Death Wish" and "Sudden Impact" from one-man moviemaking band John S. Rad, who served as writer, director, producer, production designer, editor, composer, set director and executive producer. You may wonder how one man could do all those jobs on the same film but after watching the shoddy results, one would be hard-pressed to prove that he did much of anything.

As the film opens, the sweet and lovely Mira (Melody Wiggins) is deliriously happy over her recent engagement but that happiness is shattered when a day at the beach with her fiancee is interrupted when two bikers appear out of nowhere, attempt to rape her and kill the fiancee in the process, though he takes out one of them beforehand. Immediately--as in the bodies are still on the beach--Mira goes off with the surviving biker to a motel and distracts him with her powerful sexuality long enough to stab him to death. After pulling that off, she goes up on a rampage of killing every sleazy potential rapist that comes in her path while her almost-brother-in-law pursues both her and, for reasons I never quite got, a ruthless bike gang leader named Black Pepper (and this isn't racist since he looks like one of the guys from Nelson.)

Filmed piecemeal in the 80s and 90s and briefly released in 2005--two years before Rad's death from a heart attack, "Dangerous Men" is, of course, as cruddy as anything that you will ever seen on a movie screen in your lifetime--the whole thing looks and feels like a second-rate porno film in which all of the Good Parts have been inexplicably extracted. Even as an example of do-it-yourself filmmaking from the pre-indie movement, it is pretty much terrible beyond belief. The real question, however, is whether it is unintentionally amusing enough to warrant a look for those with a taste for good bad cinema--the kind who didn't need to look up "Manos" and "The Room" to know what I was talking about. I say no because I have seen plenty of entertaining cheese from a bygone era over the years ("Switchblade Sisters" comes to mind) and this is not it. With barely enough plot to fill an hour-long cop show, Rad jams so much bizarre filler into the mix (such as a weird encounter Mira has with a businessman who gives her a ride and then tries to rape her that ends with him naked and dancing in the desert) that even at a relatively short 80 minutes, it nevertheless feels endless. The sex is anything but arousing, the violence is laughable and the story is such a mess that our ostensible heroine just kind of disappears from the action for the last 15 minutes.

Basically, "Dangerous Men" is the kind of film that you used to find gathering dust at the local video store back in the days when virtually anything that even remotely looked like a feature film could get a video release deal. Of course, back then, you could rent it for a dollar or so, watch it in the privacy of your own home as fast-forward through the tedious parts to get to the good stuff--even if you didn't finish it, there wasn't much of an investment of time, money or effort. Now, for the price of a full ticket, you can sit through the exact same thing in an audience of people that will probably be encouraged to talk and quip all the way through in the misbegotten belief that they are the second coming of MST3K. If that sounds like fun, knock yourself out. Me--I'll stick with "Manos," thank you. I tell you, that Torgo is going places.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=13136&reviewer=389
originally posted: 11/20/15 10:33:46
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User Comments

11/21/15 NZP Hyper feminist violence against women theme. Only acting: women struggling during rapes. 5 stars
9/12/06 Keline Williams A campy, hilarious movie with several plots. And the woman got arrested (for TUDM). 2 stars
8/04/06 Bryan E Wendorf Amazing! I didn't think they made them like this anymore! Hilarious trash! 5 stars
1/09/06 a. kurlovs i adore this movie and everything that's so horrible about it 5 stars
12/11/05 obscuro Riotously funny through it's ineptness; surpasses Quintet as best worst movie! 5 stars
9/30/05 Movie Sluts "Sucks" is too flattering 1 stars
9/30/05 Leegs One of the greatest "bad" movies ever made 5 stars
9/30/05 Marie incomprehensibly mind-numbing and adorably weird, a singular vision 4 stars
9/30/05 dave white i just saw this at the laemmle music hall and it made me retarded 5 stars
9/29/05 Eric How the hell did this movie get into theatres 1 stars
9/27/05 Alec Johnson This film ROCKS! It was the most entertaining film I have seen this year. 5 stars
9/27/05 Carlos Great 21st century Ed Wood film to watch with friends drunk and/or stoned. 5 stars
9/26/05 Erlik Khan The best movie I've ever seen, by far 5 stars
9/25/05 Rodolfo Bachman The real challenge is to find out how this movie got to theaters 1 stars
9/25/05 Seanboy Best Movie Ever!!!!! Just kiddin, this movie fuckin sucked 1 stars
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  23-Sep-2005 (NR)



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