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Overall Rating

Awesome: 16.44%
Worth A Look: 16.44%
Just Average: 19.18%
Pretty Crappy34.25%
Sucks: 13.7%

6 reviews, 37 user ratings

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by Rob Gonsalves

"So much eye candy your eyes may get cavities. Or something."
4 stars

If "Ultraviolet" had subtitles and starred someone like Maggie Cheung or, say, Elina Löwensohn about ten years ago, it might get a fairer shake. The movie is blathering sub-pop nonsense from scalp to toes, but, damn, is it fun to look at. Forget the subtitles, even — just turn the sound off, put on the techno or classical music or whatever soundtrack of your choice, and coast on the visuals. Writer/director Kurt Wimmer may not have two original ideas to rub together, but he sure as hell has an eye.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that Milla Jovovich can act, but she has a surly supermodel presence and looks comfortable spinning around and waving sharp objects; in this film, that's just about enough. Milla plays Violet, a "hemophage" (vampire) who takes it upon herself to protect a boy (Cameron Bright) carrying lethal antigens in his blood. This involves lots of costume changes, and since Violet is a busy woman, the movie helpfully changes her costumes for her via computer coloring. Sometimes her hair changes too. If you don't like how Milla looks at any given time, wait two minutes and she'll reboot for you.

Ultraviolet frequently lost me; it has the kind of simplistic yet convoluted plot that becomes white noise to my brain. But Kurt Wimmer, whose equally derivative yet eye-boggling Equilibrium was hailed by some (mostly the folks at CHUD) as the greatest thing since bullet-riddled bread, seems to have dedicated himself to making the prettiest pulp ever. Literally every frame has a burnished sheen, and the close-ups are digitally airbrushed — it looks like a high-end comic drawn by Richard Corben or Pete Von Sholly. A scene in which Violet and the boy share a rare moment of respite during a fireworks display — the colors and lights playing moodily on their faces — is gorgeous visual poetry. Directors have been lionized for far less.

Of course, to fully enjoy Ultraviolet you have to agree to overlook its story — which is eminently overlookable — and let it have its way with your eyes. I sympathize with the many charges against the film. "Idiotic," some have said. "Hollow," others say. "How the hell does Milla Jovovich keep getting film work," ask still others. Apologies, but these objections are beside the point of the movie and beyond its purview. It wants only to catch Milla in a variety of poses against lovingly stylized backdrops while she handles weaponry and looks fetching in sunglasses. Which also change color.

This is the kind of movie that makes me glad there's a "Worth a Look" rating here. "Ultraviolet" is absolutely worth a look — if not a listen or a thought.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=14081&reviewer=416
originally posted: 06/28/06 23:35:59
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User Comments

10/15/17 Carl Martin Film either dwells on Jovovich' looks or on bad swordplay. 2 stars
2/08/13 Yup I think it's a fine film. Not my favorite, but I definitely don't think t's crap. 4 stars
1/21/12 Kyle Not many will like this movie, but it is great 5 stars
9/15/10 the dork knight Is this supposed to be based on those Esurance commericals? 2 stars
10/23/09 Schezarde creative motorcycle side of a building hair/clothes colorChange fire swords pink blast gun 4 stars
11/07/08 darin yuhas i liked the movie i dont care what aney body says there a bunch of idiots! 5 stars
11/21/07 fools♫gold Not like the awesome vampire show of the samename. Lotsa greatstoriesto watchotherthanthis. 1 stars
6/30/07 us Ouch! Can I get a refund on the last two hours of my life? 1 stars
5/10/07 nathan its a very good movie 5 stars
1/22/07 Brian Mckay Best parts = opening credits and Milla's wardrobe. Action is subpar, though plentiful. 2 stars
11/09/06 LJ Great Style Flick, watch it 4 design and effects - no good film stories out now anyway! 4 stars
10/23/06 Browncoat Quite satisfactory 5 stars
10/17/06 sci-fi lover sucked, millas hot, movie is not. Over blown,over directed piece of garbage 1 stars
9/07/06 Jiz Cheesy effects, contrived fight scenes, lame characters, predictable plot. 2 stars
9/06/06 Booksworm Excellent! "V for Vendetta" meets "Underworld"! Reminds me why I go to the movies! 5 stars
8/14/06 Indrid Cold One of the most extreme examples I've ever seen of emphasizing style over substance. 2 stars
7/09/06 charles i hate this crappie movie 2 stars
7/07/06 Rocky Cool looking special effects, modestly entertaining story, repetitive fight scenes 3 stars
6/26/06 noddy was peter watching the same film. worst film i have seen in 10 years. 1 stars
6/04/06 mary awesome 5 stars
4/27/06 Erika Clarkson Milla J & her diarrhea BELONG in a cesspool, but her stinkiest BM is this BAD MOVIE! 1 stars
4/22/06 Don Paco What a load of crap. Someone save Milla from this cesspool! 2 stars
4/21/06 Dominic Chiu Ultraviolet is a piece of Garbage that is not even worth a penny. 1 stars
3/27/06 Danny Johanson Yeah, Craptastic. Pretty... but crap 2 stars
3/16/06 ducka Really bad, but really cool looking 2 stars
3/15/06 malcolm action scenes almost make this movie average, but we've seen it all before 2 stars
3/13/06 JKava Visually tantalizing! Will get posters of Milla. Script is absent however. 3 stars
3/12/06 dieselboise This was one of the worst movies I have ever seen 1 stars
3/10/06 Jim McLennan Enjoyably comic-book, in both style and action 4 stars
3/09/06 Steve Michaud Makes "Aeon Flux" look like "Blade Runner" by comparison 1 stars
3/08/06 Mushuga Meh...no better or worse than "Aeon Flux"...that says it all. 2 stars
3/06/06 Darren Shea Visually stunning, but it seems to revel in its incomprehensibility. 2 stars
3/06/06 RealFilmFan Ultraviolet sucked, so take that Peter Sobczynski. 1 stars
3/06/06 Nightcat Amazing special effects and fighting. Don't watch if you are expecting oscar performances 4 stars
3/05/06 Movie Critic This movie is a piece of shit wrapped in shit. 1 stars
3/04/06 Evil Wolfie Plot makes no sense and the action bits are bland due to PG rating. Should be bloodier..... 2 stars
3/03/06 KingNeutron Very cool, stylistic film; but you really have to understand the director's vision to enjoy 4 stars
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  03-Mar-2006 (PG-13)
  DVD: 27-Jun-2006



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