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Overall Rating

Awesome: 9.09%
Worth A Look: 3.9%
Just Average: 2.6%
Pretty Crappy: 9.09%

5 reviews, 47 user ratings

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Epic Movie
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by Doug Bentin

"Ipecac Movie"
1 stars

“Epic Movie” is – We interrupt this film review for an important announcement from the Department of Homeland Security.

Terrorists have invaded America. They want to kill you. Worse yet, they want to drive you mad so you will start killing each other. A zombie plague would be a picnic in a flowery glade compared to what these terrorists have in store for you.

They’ve made a motion picture they want you to see. It’s called “Epic Movie” and its advertising would lead you to believe that it is a comic take-off on Hollywood blockbusters. It does, in fact, contain scenes parodying such legitimate films as “Pirates of the Caribbean,” “The Chronicles of Narnia,” “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory,” and “Snakes on a Plane.” This latter scene must have been dreamed up before the terrorists figured out that the original picture was going to tank. The scene isn’t funny. It isn’t even a scene. It’s an obscene.

This alleged comedy stars Kal Penn, who is trying to get in the Guinness Book of World Records for appearing in more lame comedies than Pauley Shore, Dana Carvey, and every friend Adam Sandler ever had combined. Starring with Penn are Adam Campbell, a repeat offender from last year’s “Date Movie,” Faune A. Chambers, who made the Least Wanted List from her appearance in “White Chicks,” and Jayma Mays, who was amusing in “Red Eye.” Note: there is something very wrong when you’re funnier in a Wes Craven thriller than you are in a farce.

Also in cameos of varying lengths are Jennifer Coolidge, Fred Willard, Crispin Glover, Carmen Electra, and David Carradine. We must surmise that when these respectable actors read the script they thought, “Hey, this could be funny.” Warning to actors—unless you think “Hey, this is funny,” steer clear. Also look for the names Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer as writers/directors. These guys are to parody films what Charles Ng and Leonard Lake were to double dating.

Beware of the feeling that some of the material in this film actually works. It does contain the occasional smile-inducing moment. For instance, while Fred Willard, as Aslo the lion-man, is battling a black actor in white face playing an albino with a flagellance problem, we can see clearly that Willard’s stunts are being performed by an Asian martial artist. While watching most gag-a-minute comedies of this nature, we tell ourselves, if we miss a joke another will be along in just a second. With “Epic Movie,” when a gag works we miss the next three or four that don’t because we’re shocked at the momentary success.

If “Epic Movie” is playing at a theater near you, avoid it all cost. Stay home. Lock your doors. See this film and the terrorists win.

We now return to the film review in progress.

-- the worst film to come along since “Larry the Cable: Health Inspector.” Skip it. In fact, run like hell.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=15558&reviewer=405
originally posted: 02/15/07 14:17:04
[printer] printer-friendly format  

User Comments

5/23/20 Jenny Tullwartz Gadzooks! Willy Wonka went over to the dark side of the farce! 3 stars
11/03/18 Kingneutron This was BADLY DIRECTED and not very funny 2 stars
8/15/11 chris Trying Hard for laughs the movie 1 stars
7/18/11 art On second thought, a Great Satire of adventure films,Jayma Mays is the New Anna FAris! 4 stars
5/31/10 User Name It doesn't really parody anything, as much as it yells "this existed!". 1 stars
2/16/10 JM Synth Not just unfunny, it's poorly made with production values well below theatrical standards 1 stars
1/24/10 art "very funny" jayma mays IS a poor man"s anna faris! 1 stars
8/30/09 Pat How are there any five star votes at all? Are you people stupid or something? 1 stars
7/01/09 Josie Cotton is a goddess A masterpice when compared to 'Meet The Spartens;' not like that says anything 2 stars
1/15/09 FrankNFurter Pop-culture refernces without humor does not = humor.Shameful poo! 1 stars
8/28/08 Shaun Wallner Never laughed so hard in my Life!! 5 stars
7/22/08 David Epic Fail. 1 stars
7/07/08 art AN"EPIC" 1 stars
5/06/08 Sarbu Rada The movie was sooo boring... and bad, of course :D 1 stars
8/15/07 Ashley Didn't even laugh once at this Date Movie wannabe. At least Date Movie was funni! 1 stars
6/27/07 Sebastian Luna This movie rocks!!! 5 stars
6/27/07 Dr. Isaksson I am a CS Lewis fan and the ode to Narnia was the only redeeming value. Just not funny. 2 stars
6/21/07 my name is... great- hysterically funny, mainly in the terrible acting 5 stars
5/29/07 Valenitnh Great movie 5 stars
5/22/07 Devin Burdett This movie is awesome 5 stars
4/30/07 desto mostly bad acting, terrible humour... it SUCKED 1 stars
4/17/07 David Pollastrini pretty silly! 2 stars
4/16/07 Robert Frost -10 stars. Don't go on this path. 1 stars
4/05/07 Ariadne Christina Renee Gladstone Pretty much the kind of spoof that pseudochristian C.S. Lewis deserves! 4 stars
3/28/07 Darlene Groetz Right Regina, parts should be different--ditch the humping & especially the tragic wands! 3 stars
3/28/07 Regina Haniger Some parts too discombobulated,but on whole a decent spoof.(I'd've made some parts dif'rnt) 4 stars
3/02/07 jonny cash awesome 5 stars
2/23/07 The chode complete GARB 1 stars
2/20/07 Beau i only enjoyed the norbit preview before the movie, i coodnt stop laughing. movies trash 1 stars
2/18/07 Tiffany trashy, i only laughed a couple of times. wasnt worth the money 2 stars
2/15/07 Axel Leos One of the worst movies i have seen.... 1 stars
2/14/07 Pete Zerria A complete waste of time & money. Should have been rated "R" too 1 stars
2/12/07 The chode Worst movie I have seen in years. 1 stars
2/11/07 Shobert Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer are 100% sans talent. 1 stars
2/11/07 Austin Wertman Wheres the humor? 1 stars
2/05/07 Kischuta There was only one laugh to be had from the entire movie. 1 stars
2/01/07 Joe The only thing this movie has going for it is Carmen Electra in blue body paint. 1 stars
1/30/07 tom umm... was this a movie, a couple laughs, but no more than watching jerry springer 1 stars
1/29/07 Mikey Damn. That sucked. 'Nuff Said. 1 stars
1/29/07 mike laughed my ass off when aslo kept changing from the old guy to the chinese guy but thats it 2 stars
1/28/07 Raymond Chandler Brian Orndorf, you're my best friend 1 stars
1/28/07 bob waste of money 1 stars
1/27/07 Shoshie This movie is trash. 1 stars
1/27/07 del Who the HELL keeps giving these guys money to make movies?!?!?!?!?!?! 1 stars
1/27/07 mets1986 One of the top % worst movies I have EVER seen! 1 stars
1/27/07 Nick-o-less This Movie Is Fucking Funny 5 stars
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  26-Jan-2007 (PG-13)
  DVD: 22-May-2007

  09-Feb-2007 (15)
  DVD: 11-Jun-2007

  25-Jan-2007 (M)

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