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Awesome: 17.76%
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5 reviews, 77 user ratings

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Twilight (2008)
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by Rob Gonsalves

"Could've been worse..."
4 stars

"Twilight" opens with Kristen Stewart, the new princess of the flat affect, morosely narrating "I never gave much thought to how I would die." That's your first clue if the desaturated gray-on-white cinematography hasn't already clued you in that this isn't going to be a bubbly night at the movies.

Adapted from the first novel in Stephenie Meyer's wildly popular series, Twilight is a quiet and unemphatic smudge of a movie, wherein a human girl, Stewart's Bella Swan, moves to a rainy Washington State town and encounters a strange boy, Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson). Edward is obsessed with Bella the minute he lays his color-changing eyes on her, because he can read everyone else's mind but hers. Oh, yes, and he's also a vampire. But that's okay, because the vampire clan he's from are "vegetarians" they feed on animal blood, not human. There are other local vampires, though, who aren't so nice. Bella thinks Edward is awfully pretty, especially when he twinkles in the daylight.

Yes, this material is terribly purple. And it shrewdly targets the same soft spots of the same demographic teenage girls and wishful-thinking older women that has kept doomed-romance stories going since Tristan and Isolde. But the gifted director Catherine Hardwicke (Thirteen, Lords of Dogtown) approaches Twilight as another portrait in her gallery of teen angst. She doesn't go at the film as the first in a likely lucrative franchise; she makes it a Catherine Hardwicke film, convincing in small, everyday details. She doesn't quite know what to do with the supernatural elements, which always seem to throw off the tone, though the scenes of Edward taking Bella on a hop between various high trees are nicely accomplished.

Edward must protect Bella from the bad vampires, but also from himself. Wearing his hair in a James Dean near-pompadour, Robert Pattinson speaks in an intimate hush, both surprised and frightened by letting someone else in. He doesn't look like much in photos, but he knows how to smolder; he does most of the heavy lifting, while Kristen Stewart, largely so laid-back she's hardly there, throws away her lines as if she wanted to get back to her trailer as soon as possible. Edward complains that he can't read Bella; we know how he feels.

The film's gun-metal look rubs the eyes raw after a while, but Twilight is mostly elegantly put together, though anything having to do with the pack of bad vampires is disastrous there's a ridiculous West Side Story shot of the rival vamps growling at each other. Other than that, the movie is appealingly low-key, with eternal love blossoming among the grim rainclouds and plaid flannel of the Pacific Northwest. As usual, Hardwicke seems most interested in the rapport between teenage girls, and Bella's cop father, a stoic fellow with undertones of sadness, is handled sensitively.

It's entirely possible to admire "Twilight" for its directorial craft without falling for Stephenie Meyer's particular brand of forbidden love. I'll be curious to see whether the other directors of this franchise can find interesting things in it or just whorishly bow to the bestselling material.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=17385&reviewer=416
originally posted: 11/15/09 23:56:09
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User Comments

9/14/17 morris campbell teeny bopper crap 1 stars
1/27/16 Taylor Love this film! 5 stars
2/14/15 jason gracio this movie for girl, children, retarded people and geek like harry fucking potter movies 1 stars
11/13/14 Thomas Could you transfer $1000 from my current account to my deposit account? <a href=" htt 2 stars
11/10/14 Derek What's the last date I can post this to to arrive in time for Christmas? <a href=" h 5 stars
11/09/14 Charlie Could you transfer $1000 from my current account to my deposit account? <a href=" htt 5 stars
11/09/14 Amia What's the last date I can post this to to arrive in time for Christmas? <a href=" h 4 stars
10/23/14 Charlotte Cool site goodluck :) <a href=" ">how much does bimatoprost cost</a> The new Explore feat 5 stars
3/22/12 maxomai somewhere between paint drying and "wtf am I watching." 1 stars
10/13/11 ashley rexrode love this movie 5 stars
4/29/11 art I EAT MY WORD"S from last year,THIS IS AN EXCELLENT FABLE! 5 stars
2/22/11 Joey Something of a small masterpiece in the romance novel genre. 5 stars
12/13/10 sandra dee a awesome movie based on a great book with a wonderful romance. 5 stars
11/28/10 hunt a cool vampire romance flick with cool action and making out. 4 stars
11/28/10 car a epic gothic romance with cool effects and a decent story 4 stars
11/11/10 Lundon how anyone can enjoy this movie i'll never know very slow not a whole lot happens 1 stars
9/04/10 anjana twilight is a good teenage love story.i love edward 5 stars
6/17/10 art PLAY"S better as a DIME NOVEL,rathr than a NIGHTMARE movie! 1 stars
5/26/10 Daniel Well directed considering the material. Beautifully shot in a Goth way. 4 stars
3/16/10 LP Quagmire Gas-passing vampires are no fun. 1 stars
2/10/10 amanunsa cool man 5 stars
1/20/10 Stanley Thai A timeless romance with vampires. The performances are great! 4 stars
12/27/09 jcanthony The reviewer's right-rent Buffy. There's nothing original here. 1 stars
12/20/09 amy Pretty good. It was better than I had expected. Judge for yourself. 4 stars
12/15/09 TheGreatMillz33 All I can say is that Twilight as a whole is a great dissapointment. 1 stars
12/13/09 Sakes Twilight rocks. Edward is deliciously good and amazing with his emotions. Great deep movie 5 stars
12/10/09 Lucas Twilight is complete garbage. You want a REAL vampire book? Go read something of Ann Rice's 1 stars
11/28/09 nora wazwaz WHO EVER HATES TWILIGHT IS A NUB!! I LOVE THE MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
11/26/09 art OVERRATED JUNK! 1 stars
11/23/09 Albert Valentin It is a pretty good movie with dark tones and a tragic romance 4 stars
11/21/09 FrankNFurter Kristen Stewart is the worst actress.Ever.Makes a corpse look too enthusiastic. 1 stars
11/19/09 ronald Holst great If you are very young and love Vampires 3 stars
11/18/09 Stewie Mills and Boon for Generation 'Y' 1 stars
11/16/09 millersxing twits 3 stars
10/18/09 auzzie chickie the book? Awesome. The movie? Awful! To save from let down watch the movie first. 1 stars
10/14/09 art THIS IS FOR LITTLE KID"S! 1 stars
9/06/09 art PURE COMIC-BOOK DRIEVEL! 1 stars
9/05/09 CTT If CW ever made a vampire story... 2 stars
7/26/09 Arsenic More boring than watching paint dry. I gave up halfway and snuck into a different movie 1 stars
6/17/09 jurisprudence terrible 1 stars
6/02/09 Matt This making 200 fucking mil is everything that's wrong with America. i havent even seen it 1 stars
5/31/09 art "YEAH I REALLY DUG THIS YARN" 1 stars
5/28/09 Bobby the Critic hehehe...bob 2 stars
5/01/09 kali super 5 stars
4/13/09 Dion Stewart has charisma on screen. DIrector got the tone of the movie right to the book. 4 stars
3/30/09 Dani O. Mah naemz Bella n I preeeeetty n I mov 2 small town n make out w/ sparklee vamp-boy. *puke* 1 stars
3/28/09 Eric Stewart & Pattinson pretty good, but overall the movie didn't live up to the hype. 3 stars
3/26/09 Amy Boring. Stupid fake makeup. Bad special effects. Why are all the boys wearing lipstick? 2 stars
3/22/09 eidy V Not what I was expecting never have read the book, but nice flick for a date. nice overall. 4 stars
2/04/09 Rio Twilight is film's answer to the Jonas Brothers. Sucks, but sells with stupid fangirls. 1 stars
2/01/09 Ashley It was suckish.The book was WAYYYYYYYY better 1 stars
1/08/09 Samiijo German the best movie i ever seen ! honestly the book was better, but i still love the movie. :} 5 stars
1/04/09 Koko I have never read the books. After seeing the movie, I really don't want to. 1 stars
12/18/08 Morgan hopelessly dissapointing. no chemistry. krud acting. 2 stars
12/15/08 Cesceli This Movie Is the best Movie i have ever seen in yeqars.I lOve how you write your books, it 5 stars
12/04/08 Joan Lunden What a waste of money. I could have spent it on a new black dildo. 1 stars
11/28/08 Rebekah I absolutely loved it! 5 stars
11/28/08 Kat You're all nuts. Best comedy I've seen all year. 5 stars
11/27/08 littlered this movie rocks. everyone should see it! 5 stars
11/27/08 Rachel Rigodon Don't do it! Stay away! 2 stars
11/26/08 Jonathan Why watch "Twilight" when we've got "True Blood" on HBO? 2 stars
11/23/08 Nicole your review is so accurate it's scary 1 stars
11/23/08 Obi Wan What kinda vampire movie has vamps with no fangs?! 2 stars
11/22/08 AJ Muller Not completely horrible but nowhere near GOOD; can't deny any faults mentioned either. 2 stars
11/21/08 Hailey Incredible review. I feel enlightened. 1 stars
11/21/08 Lauren Hilarious review. This is pretty much everything I've hated about the series, put on screen 1 stars
11/21/08 Raul Valdez Jr This movie is for the book fans not really for those who are horror fans. 4 stars
11/21/08 Evan Wow that review rocked. Let The Right One in is way superior. Great book and movie. 1 stars
11/21/08 Andy I'm really not that surprised. Poorly written book, poorly constructed movie. 1 stars
11/21/08 Kate A lot of the problems you had with the movie are problems that are found in the book. 1 stars
11/21/08 Maria From your review alone, it sounds insanely faithful to its source material. 2 stars
11/21/08 jes A big disappointment 2 stars
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  21-Nov-2008 (PG-13)
  DVD: 21-Mar-2009



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