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Overall Rating
3.26

Awesome: 23.38%
Worth A Look25.97%
Just Average: 16.88%
Pretty Crappy: 20.78%
Sucks: 12.99%

5 reviews, 47 user ratings


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Replacements, The
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by Chef ADogg

"They just don't make cliched sports flicks like they used to."
1 stars

"The Replacements" should have gone off without a hitch--likeable cast, cute plot, and a veteran director who pretty well knows his shit. At the very least, it could have been an enjoyable genre picture and moderate hit. But something went very, very wrong when they were making this one, and it stands as one of the worst, most joyless films of the year.

Horror movies. Erotic thrillers. Romantic comedies. These are simple things; films that can be successful and effective without ever coming close to aesthetic quality. Just entertain your audience. Give them ninety minutes away from their boring, frustrating lives. But Howard Deutch and Vince McKewin have botched the formula so badly that even a ten year old kid wouldn't admit to enjoying this horrible crap.

When I was little, Keanu Reeves was one of my favorite actors. It wasn't because he gave the best performances, or was even mildly realistic in his roles. I liked him simply because he was cool. There's something very appealing about aloofness, and Reeves remains likeable even in trash like "The Replacements." So he's not the problem. Nor is Gene Hackman, Jon Favreau, Brooke Langton, or Rhys Ifans. They all showed up prepared for greatness, but someone forgot to give them funny lines, or interesting things to do.

That's a shame, because the set-up is a great opportunity for lots of old school fish-out-of-water humor. Reeves stars as Shane Falco, a once great college football star who's recruited by veteran coach Jimmy McGinty (Hackman) to head up a team of "scab" players to replace the pros, who are on strike. This could go in so many great directions, yet "The Replacements" remains hopelessy stranded on the sidelines.

For one thing, the pros are all portrayed as cartoonish cads--they whine, they snivel, they overturn Keanu's truck when he shows up for practice. We're pushed so roughly to sympathize with the scabs that the audience can't help but grow uncomfortable, and the replacement players themselves are such a boring bunch that the only thing you'll really be rooting for is a short running time.

By and large, "The Replacements" would have been middling entertainment if any time at all had been spent on the script. But it becomes offensive in the hands of Deutch and McKewin; it seems sometimes as if they didn't write any lines at all--just a bare bones plot outline. Three minutes of exposition, fifty minutes of bonding, big game. And that's about it; the dialogue scenes are helter skelter and the plot is a contrived mess that barely makes its way from one scene to the next.

In short, there's a thin line between simple and simple-minded. The filmmakers behind "The Replacements" obviously weren't interested enough in finding it. I mean, look at Keanu's face--even he knows the script sucks.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=1962&reviewer=123
originally posted: 08/19/00 23:41:16
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User Comments

5/21/16 Jamie Funny, predictable,feel good.Great cast! Scenes with lapdancer/cheerleaders hilarious! 4 stars
7/30/07 ravenmad Loved it, laughed my ass off. 4 stars
9/30/06 Tamara D. Leonard Such a terrific movie. I really enjoy watching it. One of the few DVDs I actually bought. 5 stars
6/10/06 Jeff Anderson A "BEEN THERE, DONE THAT" kind of film, but it's fun. Langton however, is great EYE CANDY!! 3 stars
5/27/05 critic I usually hate these movies..especially Keanu Reeves movies, but I liked this one 4 stars
11/23/04 Hitman Best Movie I have ever seen!!!!!!!!!!!! Football Rules! 5 stars
5/05/04 J.Peckerfoot Its different and easy to watch,you cant complain about harmless fun like this! 4 stars
1/10/04 kaz a nice,funny movie 4 stars
4/17/03 Jack Bourbon Clip. Holding. Clip. Clip. Clip. 3 stars
3/25/03 Jack Sommersby Good fun. 4 stars
2/05/03 natasha_theobald I think it's funny and I don't care who knows it (shhh) 4 stars
2/27/02 Gracy Lionheart As a comedy, this is pretty funny. I love the tip-toeing vomit scene. 4 stars
1/31/02 Geo7654 Tired sports comedy about a much of has-beens and weirdos playing football. 2 stars
7/29/01 Jennifer Gaissert Funny, sweet 3 stars
7/25/01 Janet Griffin I loved it it was hillarious 5 stars
7/16/01 Piz One of the best funny football movies with a little heart to go with it. kick-ass soundtrck 4 stars
7/03/01 TLsmooth I love football, but football movies suck giraffe cocks. 2 stars
6/14/01 Katie Zayed AWESOME!! FRIGGIN AWESOME 5 stars
6/11/01 Bada Bing Crosby I think Moses and John the Baptist did the first version of this story 1 stars
5/03/01 roby lafon another keanu reeves great 5 stars
4/08/01 azizul fucking good movie 5 stars
4/01/01 moviegoer it was okay, acting was a little worse than it could have been, funny 4 stars
3/17/01 thomas noviello the movie was awesome. keanu is fuckin awesome as shit 5 stars
1/20/01 dog was a good film however would have like to see what happend in the playoffs. 4 stars
1/08/01 Keanuette I liked it! KEANU as a quaterback? Yes Please. Can't wait for the sequels!!! 5 stars
1/02/01 sandy Brett Cullen as the arrogant, yet sexy pro quarterback Martel rocked & Keanu didn't suck! 4 stars
12/05/00 Monday Morning Appealing characters but we've seen exact plot formula at least a million times. Ergo... 3 stars
12/04/00 The Bomb 69 very entertaining but had plot holes the size of Texas 3 stars
11/20/00 The Bill Head IT WAS LIKE WATCHING A BOWL OF DIARRHEA DRY 1 stars
11/19/00 Elin Farrington this movie totally kicked ass and keanu was a great quarter back 5 stars
11/19/00 chelsea ROCKED 5 stars
11/18/00 sandra the movie was great and Keanu looked good ,as always 5 stars
11/18/00 irene franco i liked it a lot! 5 stars
11/18/00 Jupiter Keanu is soo sexy but I hate the "F" word being used to describe it 5 stars
11/17/00 NATALIE I LOVE KEANU,I LOVE THE MOVIE!!!! 5 stars
11/17/00 Lida Was pretty good 4 stars
8/27/00 Captain Highcrime Keanu: pushing 40 and looking every bit of it. 3 stars
8/23/00 KAM This movie was so funny 5 stars
8/20/00 JonnyA the first movie where I actually fell asleep in the theater 1 stars
8/20/00 The Gipper Mega disappointing. So ordinary & crappy, but Brooke Langton is fine, and Keanu is cool 2 stars
8/14/00 Clarance If you are looking for some awesome laughs and a good time! A MUST SEE!!!!!!! 4 stars
8/14/00 Chickiepoo I was disapointed. Girls will hate this trashy film. 1 stars
8/13/00 TimmyToday Best flick this summer!! 5 stars
8/12/00 chuck Fun time, laughs and pretty women 5 stars
8/12/00 JonnyA poopie 2 stars
8/12/00 DatherFrawdad no stripper chearleaders in the mighty ducks, bitch! 5 stars
8/11/00 Justin it's mighty ducks playin football, sometimes funny, keanu stick to dodging bullets!!!! 3 stars
IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS FILM, RATE IT!
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USA
  11-Aug-2000 (PG-13)

UK
  N/A

Australia
  09-Nov-2000 (M)


Directed by
  Howard Deutch

Written by
  Vince McKewin

Cast
  Keanu Reeves
  Gene Hackman
  Jon Favreau
  Jack Warden
  Brooke Langton
  Orlando Jones



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