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Overall Rating

Worth A Look: 21.62%
Just Average: 6.76%
Pretty Crappy: 10.81%
Sucks: 0.68%

6 reviews, 112 user ratings

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Crow, The (1994)
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by the Grinch

"'The Wraith: Part 2? If only it was!'"
2 stars

This is probably one of the most overrated movies I've ever seen. Visually, The Crow is a quite stunning film....real eye candy with intricate set design, costumes, and clever lighting. What's that? Is there any substance to the movie? Nope, unfortunately not. The Crow is like someone you spot across the room who you think is attractive...until they speak!

If you haven't seen this movie by now, well, I'll have to assume you must live in a hole in the ground with Bilbo Baggins or something. Just let me warn you beforehand that there may be a spoiler or two in the upcoming review, so if you're not hip to it, DROP IT LIKE A HAMBURGER FROM JACK-IN-THE-BOX! But trust me, the movie itself will spoil more for you than I ever could.

Just so it can't be said that I trashed this film for my jollies, I'll give some backing points as to why this left a worse taste in my mouth than that guy named Big Leon who I shared a cell with:

1. For someone who's been dead for a pretty long while, Eric Draven looks remarkably good. By all means, the guy should've been a wretched, pissed-off zombie straight out of a new wave Romero film. We can't have that, though, that would make the cover of Teen Beat look more like Fangoria. I wonder why Calvin Klein doesn't hire CORPSES instead of models to promote their underwear...oh wait, they do!

2. Okay, the woman you love has been ruthlessly murdered, as well as yourself...working, working, working your way out of the grave, all you can think about is avenging your love...BUT WAIT! Before you get revenge, you have to pick up some white grease-paint makeup and eyeliner so you can make yourself up like some sort of Marcel Marceau Crack-Addict Mime! Puh-lease.

3. What the hell is with that 1-2 minute rippin guitar solo on top of the roof!? My wife's murderers are walking free to kill, but, hey wait! I just got an idea for a rippin lead! WEowowow-wow...Yeah! Rock n ROll! Eddie Van, you got nothing on Eric Draven! The title song "Can't Rain All the TIme" should've been called NO BRAIN ALL THE TIME!

4. Note to all filmmakers: Inserting scenes of hip bands playing in hipper clubs does not make you hip to your target audience. (See also "Hideaway" and "Crow:City of Angels")

5. How come the thugs always have to have clever biker names, like, RIN TIN, or SNAKE? How bout some thugs with names like Glamour Boy, Mike, Horace, or Basil? Just an observation.

In a nutshell, this movie really isn't much different or much better than the movie "the Wraith" which had the same plot, and almost the same characters, and came 10 or so years earlier. I will say that there's some good action scenes, and the direction by Alex Proyas is top notch. The new-agey climax was kinda lame, dead lead actor or not.

The main thing that pisses me off with the Crow franchise is this: There are possibilities for this story...if there have always been different Crows, then WHY THE FUCK DO THEY KEEP THE SETTINGS, CIRCUMSTANCES, AND TIME PERIOD THE SAME AND KEEP USING THE SAME PRETTY BOY TYPE ACTORS?! My god, there's even a show based on this crap now, put out by those upholders of T.V. excellence USA Network. And it SUCKS, because they limit the story by trying to play off these teeny boppers' silly attachment to the Brandon Lee icon. Hey, how bout a Crow who was a civilian killed in an African civil war...he comes back and decimates both huntas, and saves the civilian populace? Or a little kid killed by a pedophile or SOMETHING! But hey, taking a chance at originality seems to be a new concept for these people.

The Crow: A mediocre movie, based on a mediocre comic book by a mediocre artist/writer (yes, I've read the J.O'Barr books, kill me now!). Too bad this had to be Brandon Lee's swansong. Especially in this regard, Lee gets the same pity I reserve for John Candy and Chris Farley...poor bastards.

link directly to this review at https://www.hollywoodbitchslap.com/review.php?movie=754&reviewer=156
originally posted: 09/07/99 13:51:03
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User Comments

10/30/16 morris campbell visonary and stylish storys kinda thin though 3 stars
1/18/16 Alexis H A man with a vendetta and a heart of gold 5 stars
3/30/12 jcar a very good movie with good acting and compelling story, lee is great in the part. 4 stars
5/30/11 Nikki One of my favourite films of all time (and I'm a 34 year old woman, not a 15 year old boy). 5 stars
4/28/11 man one of the best comic book movies 5 stars
1/21/11 herzog how can you beat badass as this film is? 5 stars
1/21/11 Crow94 My favorite film. Check it out. 5 stars
1/12/11 raider fucking awesome 5 stars
3/06/10 Marc Kelly My favorite movie of all time...so romantic. 5 stars
8/18/09 Jeff Wilder An exploitation movie with a heartbeat. Dated in spots. But still worthwhile. 4 stars
6/07/09 Garrett Dark, cheesy, self-involved 2 stars
9/25/08 Shaun Wallner One of my favorite all time films. 5 stars
7/30/08 georgia I liked it - was predictable though, but still worth watching! 4 stars
1/09/08 TERI Awsome,movie,good.good,movie,brandonlee,would,have,been,great,like,his,father 5 stars
10/05/07 Heretique The best. R.I.P. Brandon 5 stars
6/16/07 Lyrical Poet music,story, art direction, acting, cinematography, and action choreagrahpy are all perfect 5 stars
5/23/07 Dave excellent 5 stars
2/16/07 Punkstr2006 greatest movie ever made!!!! 5 stars
1/16/07 David Pollastrini not great, not terrible 3 stars
11/04/06 JOE Brandon Lee could have become agiant star, this performance, made him a Legend! I miss him! 5 stars
10/30/06 Justin dont fuck with the crow, asswipe 5 stars
8/05/06 nicklor24 great movie, if you haven't seen it, you're missing out 5 stars
7/31/06 bertram who ever wrote the fucked up line about the guitar solo kiss my ass you peace of shit 5 stars
5/12/06 ES I think Brandon Lee could have had an amazing career 5 stars
3/06/06 C Vega "It Cant Rain All The Time" DAMN Right!---One of the best movies i have seen 5 stars
10/25/05 Crumbcake A fucking classic and anyone who says otherwise gets a kick in the throat!!! 5 stars
10/21/05 james my fav movie of all time 5 stars
10/01/05 Nicole Love it 5 stars
9/28/05 Shari Terran It is one of the best films i have ever seen it never ages. 5 stars
9/15/05 drippy Completely and utterly amazing. 5 stars
9/06/05 JubJub Definitely a classic. 5 stars
9/02/05 Mailk A modern classic. The ultimate in gothic, baroque cinema. 5 stars
9/01/05 Edward This and DARK CITY are Alex Proyas' masterpieces...too bad I, ROBOT blew chunks. 5 stars
8/31/05 unlimited LONG LIVE BRANDON LEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
8/30/05 Christi Wilkins The original will always be the better... 5 stars
8/30/05 Vasquez best movie ever and very sad 5 stars
8/28/05 Blissful Johnny The Grinch sucks big monkey testicles...his opinion is shit...no one listen to him, okay??? 5 stars
8/28/05 Jabberjaw An out-and-out CLASSIC in every possible way. 5 stars
8/27/05 Rever_Bear-Trap Not what I expected but... GOTHIC TO THE CORE! POOR Brandon Lee! 4 stars
8/24/05 Copper A gothic, action, baroque masterpiece! Lee's performance is legendary! 5 stars
8/21/05 Rachel This movie ROCKS 5 stars
8/16/05 ES good movie, why does the Crow in all the sequels have to look like Brandon Lee? 4 stars
4/08/05 Bat Awesome fucking movie! 5 stars
2/20/05 mpg you're a fuckin retard grinch, this movies good,you revied it like a 10 year old 4 stars
2/12/05 Matt Fekete Great movie. Skip all the sequels, though. 5 stars
2/05/05 The Talking Elbow Compelling. 5 stars
11/18/04 Robert Phillips The Movie was awsome then and now 5 stars
10/16/04 Jennie Galvez The best movie on Earth!!!!!!!!!! 5 stars
10/08/04 Denise Lee was awesome cool story 5 stars
9/26/04 y2mckay The Grinch's review was actually very funny - but I disagree 4 stars
9/06/04 Sugarfoot Great movie. Lee's best, although not saying much since he did do Showdown In Little Tokyo. 4 stars
6/28/04 DM the Grinch is a complete dumbass 4 stars
5/18/04 John better than expected 4 stars
5/17/04 Fernanda is the best movie ever! 5 stars
4/22/04 Agent Sands OK, but I almost forgot about it 12 hours after I saw it. Rarely happens. Not bad, though. 3 stars
2/03/04 Sammy Jo Jessie i find myself watching it over and over again 5 stars
1/26/04 Eric Damn shame about Brandon Lee.If he could have been in the rest they may have been better. 4 stars
1/24/04 Lexi This is the best dark movie ever! Brandon Lee was awesome! 5 stars
1/17/04 Richard Hooper Visually Stunning 5 stars
10/19/03 Josh Standlee The greatest revenge movie any human being could ever make! 5 stars
10/13/03 RUSS Great action film Lee could have been Neo. 5 stars
7/28/03 Boomer One of the greatest Love Stories ever!! Bruce & Brandon live on . . .-R.I.P.- 5 stars
7/23/03 Kit Simply put. Great movie. 5 stars
7/13/03 Samuel Justus Great Story!!!! if it could only happen in the real world!!! 5 stars
6/23/03 R.W. Welch Dark fantasy has some holes, but considerable flair and strong characterizations. 4 stars
6/22/03 Jack Bourbon Dumbest shit ever made! 1 stars
5/24/03 The Crow Best Movie I ever saw!!! 5 stars
5/09/03 PunkMime This movie just simply rocks. 5 stars
4/24/03 Jack Sommersby Great-looking but choppy and uninvolving. 2 stars
1/06/03 Jim Bleak and stylish tale of revenge, love, and even redemption 5 stars
11/28/02 Eric Draven The greatest actor ever ! The greatest movie ever ! The greatest graphic novel ever ! 5 stars
11/22/02 Mimi Lohr This movie has been and will always be my most favorite fucking movie in all of time 5 stars
11/20/02 Washington Irving Theres a reason its a cult classic... 5 stars
10/24/02 COF COOOOOOOOL MOVIE!!! 5 stars
10/07/02 Ashley LOVED IT !!....Everything you could want in a movie!..Hats off to Cast and Crew! 5 stars
9/30/02 TheBomb69 shame it had to be known for the death of Brandon Lee, solid flick!!! 5 stars
9/29/02 Charles Tatum Incredible film ruined by "the accident" 5 stars
9/28/02 Buddha It just oozes style and cool. 5 stars
8/10/02 Damien Raven The BEST MOVIE EVER 5 stars
8/05/02 Lexy Z. One of my favourites. 5 stars
3/06/02 Dave The most incredible love story of all time, dark, moody, stylish, in-fookin-credible 5 stars
12/12/01 slappy jacks brandon lee was really good despite being a hack performer(godblesshissoul) 5 stars
10/10/01 Cheyenne Rea This movie is awesome, and Brandon Lee, as well as the rest of the cast, did and outstandin 5 stars
5/20/01 The Bomb 69 well done all the way around, Lee would have been a star if lived through picture 5 stars
3/24/01 Casey top-notch, this movie had it all, great star (brandon lee, R.I.P), great plot, and killer m 5 stars
3/23/01 Alex For some strange reaso the love story got to me, this is one of my favorites 5 stars
2/20/01 Rocket Boy Exquisitely heart-breaking and action-packed 5 stars
2/14/01 The Rubber Possum This is by far the greatest movie i have ever seen and possibly the best action film ever! 5 stars
11/27/00 Cristopher Revilla Destined to be a cult classic, but don't watch the shitty sequels or the series 5 stars
11/12/00 The EVIL Penguin it's too dark and pointless 2 stars
5/22/00 Obi Wan One of the best cult films!! If only we could have gotten a real sequel!! 5 stars
4/23/00 Ryan fairly decent 4 stars
3/20/00 Laura I happen to be a comic freak who loves this comic movie. There are few better 5 stars
11/18/99 KTL this film is awesome because it is well-though, not solely because Brandon Lee was in it 5 stars
9/23/99 Cyanide Rush Awsome setting, wicked acting, justified murder, solid drama and a kickin soundtrack. 5 stars
9/03/99 Myra I've yet to stay awake past the 20 minute marker. 2 stars
6/24/99 Michelle It is the best movie ever!!! 5 stars
3/04/99 Rachel Loved this movie, curse #2 and the damn tv series. 5 stars
1/11/99 demon_shredder Alex Proyas kicks ass. 5 stars
12/20/98 angie d. it sucks that Bradon Lee is dead. 5 stars
12/11/98 Scion of Graveheart Great, but what can I say? 'Nuff said. 5 stars
11/25/98 Fred 1994, the golden age of fucking awesome movies. 5 stars
11/20/98 Slupet Very Very cool movie 5 stars
10/26/98 Silent Rob Alex Proyas creates a world AND atmosphere for the characters to live in. 5 stars
10/24/98 Lord Of The Dunce Just a great fucking movie. If Brandon was still alive they'd be up to part 4 by now. 5 stars
9/20/98 Ky Well......how about.....the best movie I've ever seen??? Long live Brandon Lee!!!! 5 stars
9/16/98 cheryl_ann it captured the character from the o'barr's comic very well. lee did a great job as draven. 5 stars
9/02/98 f*r*o*s*t*y Darkness, great love story, action, all dat. 5 stars
9/01/98 J-Guy great flick, probably a little too trendy, though. 5 stars
8/30/98 Mister Whoopee Coolly gothic. Lee will be missed. Proyas knows how to go dark. 4 stars
8/29/98 Johny Atmospheric entertainer of the best sort 5 stars
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  11-May-1994 (R)


  06-Jul-1994 (MA)

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